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Do you have objectophilia?

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by Perry White, May 20, 2007.

  1. Perry White

    Perry White Active Member


    Some people love their laptops more than anything else in the world. Others are sexually aroused by musical instruments or buildings. Experts are trying to understand a bizarre sexual obsession known as objectophilia.

    Back in 1979, Eklöf tied the knot with the Berlin Wall and legally changed her name to mark the occasion ("Mauer" means "Wall" in German). Ever since she was eight years old, Sandy K. was hopelessly in love with New York's Twin Towers. Neither of these two monumental lovers were known for being particularly talkative. Nor did they seem to be blessed with qualities of seduction. But to their admirers, the buildings were male, sexy and extremely desirable.

    For 25-year-old Sandy, the attraction to things is so overpowering, she confesses: "When it comes to love, I am only attracted to objects. I couldn't imagine a love affair with a human being."
    The 41-year-old recognized and accepted his inclination when he was just 12 years old. It was then that he fell head over heels "into an emotionally and physically very complex and deep relationship, which lasted for years." His partner back then was a Hammond organ -- he has now been in a steady relationship with a steam locomotive for several years. Since he is particularly aroused by the inner workings of technical objects, repair jobs have often led to infidelity in the past. "A love affair could very well begin with a broken radiator," the now monogamous lover says, remembering how his earlier affairs began.
    Sandy K. had a model of the Twin Towers manufactured on a scale of 1:1,000. The façade consists of anodized aluminium, just like that of the original -- "so that the model feels true to life." The metal miniature has another tangible advantage: It doesn't rust when Sandy K. takes "a pleasant bath with it."
  2. PhilaYank36

    PhilaYank36 Guest

  3. chazp

    chazp Active Member

    Can we a You-Tube of Sandy taking that pleasant bath?
  4. HejiraHenry

    HejiraHenry Well-Known Member

    It's okay to love your laptop ... just don't love your laptop.
  5. PopeDirkBenedict

    PopeDirkBenedict Active Member

    I don't know about you -- but I don't care if Sandy is a psuedonym for Scarlett Johannson. I am more than a little skeeved at the thought of watching a woman orgasm because she is taking a bath with a miniature version of the World Trade Center...mmmkay?
  6. Perry White

    Perry White Active Member

    Wow it's weird to see this thread back on the first page after almost a week.
  7. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    I know of women, and a few males, who phila this object... and they o...

  8. Clever username

    Clever username Active Member

    I'm pretty sure one of our copy editors would fuck a soft couch. Closest he'll ever get, too.
  9. chazp

    chazp Active Member

    That was clutch, Slappy!
  10. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    20 years of looking at the white granite bust of Demetrius Ypsilanti and you know where to find the pic...why, is there anything else around there?
  11. Perry White

    Perry White Active Member

    It's all fun and games until the police get involved...

    A MAN has been charged with having sex with his bike.

    Robert Stewart was allegedly caught in the act by two terrified cleaners who walked into his bedroom in a hostel.

    Stewart has denied the accusation, claiming it was caused by a misunderstanding after he had too much to drink.

    The 51-year-old bachelor was charged with the bizarre sexual offence after he was disturbed by the cleaner and her colleague in a private hostel in Ayr.

    The charge alleges he conducted himself in a disorderly manner, simulated sex with a bicycle and continued to do so while naked from the waist down in the presence of two female employees.

    I assume it wouldn't have been a crime if he had stopped when the employees walked in?
  12. Mayfly

    Mayfly Active Member

    Is anyone getting worried about Perry's recent posts and where he finds them?
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