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Do you ever do this at airports?

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by Kaylee, Dec 19, 2006.

  1. BTExpress

    BTExpress Well-Known Member

    That settles it. I'm going to quit my job and rent myself out as a dream seatmate.

    5-4, 120 pounds. No kids. Was last sick sometime in the 9th grade (back in 1975).
     
  2. Norman Stansfield

    Norman Stansfield Active Member

    I took a flight on Frontier over the summer.

    Was very much looking forward to flying it -- first time -- because of the ability to watch DirecTV for a nominal fee.

    Full flight out of Denver, I'm on the aisle and two seats next to me are open. All of a sudden I see a skinny chick and a LARGE chick (300 lbs. minimum) come walking on. All I said to myself was, 'Gee, lemme guess which one is gonna be sitting next to me?'

    Yep, the big'un. Uncomfortable to say the least. But the worst part was I got screwed out of DirecTV.

    Why? Because her huge fat roll was hanging over the seatrest. More notably, the controls for the TV monitor. So rather than asking her to move it, or having to dig under it each time I wanted to flip the channel, I bit my tongue and proceeded to watch the moving map for the 2 1/2 hours instead.
     
  3. Idaho

    Idaho Active Member

    You haven't lived until you've flown on a commuter flight from Pocatello to Boise with a dairy farmer sitting next to you.
     
  4. Armchair_QB

    Armchair_QB Well-Known Member

    Many years ago I had a seatmate who answered the "So what do you do" question with "I'm a stripper."

    Have yet to have a seatmate that topped that one. I've had plenty of shitty ones though. The two worst were on two different flights from Europe to the States. 9 hours of sheer hell both times.

    The first was a rather large guy who was either over-medicated or borderline mentally unstable. That one was my fault though as I let a flight attendant guilt me into switching seats with a woman with a kid who was probably big enough that she and her husband should have bought a ticket for the little shit.

    The second trip was last year. 10-year old kid sitting behind me, FLYING BY HIMSELF. This kid was an absolute shit. Yelling, jumping up a down, giving the flight attendants shit, etc., etc. etc. It got so bad that the captain had to come out and tell him to knock it off or he was going to land in Greenland and leave his ass there.

    By the time we were halfway over the Atlantic I was seriously contemplating asking the kid where he lived so I could stop by and personally kick his father's ass for reproducing.
     
  5. ondeadline

    ondeadline Well-Known Member

    Did you slip her a dollar?
     
  6. Armchair_QB

    Armchair_QB Well-Known Member

    No, but it was the most interesting conversation I've had on an airplane.
     
  7. Pilot

    Pilot Well-Known Member

    Nice. There have been some good posts on this thread, but so far this one is the winner. I laughed loud enough to have to explain it to my office people.

    I don't fly much ... in fact, I almost always drive. I'm not opposed to it, or scared of it. I just really like driving and can't ever stop telling myself how much cheaper it is to drive seven or eight hours than it is to buy a plane ticket, pay for parking, get a cab or two, bla bla bla, especially if I'm going with someone else and I have to consider that we're splitting gas, yet paying twice as much to the airline.

    One of my 10 or so flights, however, was sort of neat. I was a very, very very very cool kid in grade school, so cool in fact that I saved up for about two years in order to go to Space Camp in Alabama. Hear me you — never have I shined like I did at Space Camp. I even won the Right Stuff award (Who wants to touch me? I SAID WHO WANTS TO FUCKING TOUCH ME?)

    Anyway, I was like 11 or something and the woman I sat next to on the plane was from Florida and lived right down from the space center there and had seen every single misson launch from the very first one to the shuttles in the 90s. What are the odds, huh? I asked her about 10,000 questions, and to her credit she answered every single one and was very nice.
     
  8. Frylock

    Frylock Member

    Not really bad experiences so much as bizarre...
    Sat next to a couple who were going to be married soon and were headed to visit family. He was petrified of flying, but she had talked him into it.
    Sure enough, right before we were going to pull away from the terminal, he bolted. She continued on with the flight.
     
  9. Pilot

    Pilot Well-Known Member

    Harry: How was your day?
    Lloyd: Not bad, fell off the jet way again.
     
  10. FuerteJ

    FuerteJ Active Member

    I'll go this route. I had a flight back from NYC recently and this elderly couple sat next to me. For a brief second, I cursed in my head. And then we started talking and it was great. He was a fighter pilot in WWII and told story after story about the war. It was tremendous.
     
  11. Has Peter King chimed in yet?
    I'll bet he has some really interesting tales.
     
  12. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    I never get the person I hope but dont get the person I pray I dont get as often as I think I will...

    Worst one I ever got was Detroit to Paris; had a 55-year-old Frenchwoman who didn't speak a bit of English next to me.
    She would try to turn her overhead light on and kept hitting the wrong button -- the call button. The stew would explain and she kept hitting the wrong light. An hour and a half into the nighttime eight and a half hour flight, she decided to turn on the light for good, then went to sleep.
    I tried turning it off once when she was sleeping; three minutes later the absence of light woke her, she turned it on, glared at me and went back to sleep.
    Little fucking troll...
     
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