Do I have to quit?

People in journalism, or ER doctors, or firefighters, or teachers who have to grade papers well into the night, or nurses, or restaurant workers, or SIDs, or IT technicians ... many jobs have some suck built into the schedule.

One of the things that drove me out of journalism was being tired of getting called into work on the whims of some terrorist. Now I lose personal time to balky technology that needs to be fixed RIGHT NOW, even if RIGHT NOW is 2:21 a.m.

My divorce (after 20 years) wasn't caused by my work schedule, but I can say without fear of contradiction that it didn't help.

 

I think my wife could have applied for sainthood after dealing with my schedule. My old paper had a knack for sending me on my longest trips of the year on almost no notice.

"Hey, remember that trip we tried to budget for six months ago and said no. Well, we're going to do it, you leave tomorrow at 6 a.m."

"It's 7:30 p.m. right now."

"Yeah? And?"

She rolled with stuff like that like a champ. It was when I'd have to leave family functions over ridiculous shit like a tight end being added to the practice squad that would piss her off. She had a right to be mad, and she never directed it at me, which was always appreciated.

The best part about my job now is that I leave it at the office. I don't think about it for a second until I arrive the next morning. That's an amazing feeling.

 

Read the Steve Ellis RIP thread (if it's still around) ... in the midst of the heart attack that set him up for his shuffling off the mortal coil, he made his wife hold off on calling the ambulance so he could finish a recruiting story. Steve was a friend from way back when -- he gave me my very first journalism job when I was a freshman in college -- but I can't say I respect the choices he made over his life with regard to work's proper place.

 

The best advice I ever got in journalism was "Don't love your job or your paper because it won't love you back."

 

I am assuming from your initial post that you are fairly young (30ish?) and don't have kids. At that stage, your schedule might not be that big of a deal to you; when I was in that position, my Saturday was either going to be working or watching 10 hours of college football, so what did I care about the rest of the world? But if you do the whole "where do you see yourself in 10 years" exercise and the answer is with a wife and kids and you're coaching their soccer or football team or you want to make sure to be home for Christmas and Thanksgiving and even Valentine's Day, the board's collective experience would probably tell you that you aren't going to feel that same rush from your job when there are other meaningful activities pulling at you.

Time was, as recently as 10-15 years ago, you could put in your time on the night/weekend shift while you were young, then you could aspire to a job with a schedule that is more in line with most humans. I don't think that exists in the news world anymore, unfortunately.

 

Are you coffee-maker salesman as well?

 

Through a mix of luck and "lowering my expectations," this is the career path I've been able to follow. Been in the biz for about 18 years; spent the 1990s as a stringer, reporter, photographer, etc., dropping everything to cover breaking news, sports on weekends, you all know the drill.

Then my son was born in 1999, and my daughter two years later, and I realized parenthood (and my marriage) was more important to me than beating other newspapers and journalists I hated.

Since then, I have slowly moved away from reporting and, basically since 2005, have been a full-time copy desker. Yeah, the second-shift hours aren't great, but they're consistent and they allow me to be done with the job when I leave at midnight.

Of course, a wife who probably is eligible for sainthood made all of this possible.

So to I'll Never Tell ... it is possible your priorities will change, and hopefully there will be a way to combine your passion for the news business with family/married life.

You only get one trip through this life, so I hope you will find a path that works for you and your loved ones.

 

Going back to childhood, the only job I ever wanted was to be a sports writer. In my mind from the time I was 5 or 6 years old, there was nothing else that even piqued my interest.

I had a career as a sports writer for several years, and I loved it. For the first several years of my marriage, it was working out fine.

Eventually, the strain started to take a toll. We got to the point of seeing each other for about four hours total each week, thanks to rough schedules and long commutes. Rather than wind up being a single sports writer, I chose to change careers and stay in what has been the best relationship of my life.

We all have a choice. For me, marriage and family became a bigger priority than my career. Now that we have a son, the personal side of life is that much more important to me. I can say without question, my life has never been happier since I changed careers. I still find ways to feel fulfilled at work, but damn if it isn't nice to leave work at the office and enjoy life at home.

All I ever wanted was to be a sports writer. Until I realized that something else was far more important to me.

No one can make the decision for you. Identify what your priorities are, and act accordingly.

 

Within three weeks of getting my buyout, I had a few offers to stay in journalism. All would have required me to move, which I had no desire to do. My wife's family is nearby. My family is reasonably nearby. My wife has a very good job. I live in a good place to raise my kids.

All of those things were much, much, much more important than staying in a field that at the absolute least, puts a strain on most marriages/families.

My career was always important to me, but when compared to my wife and kids, there was never any question what was more important to me and it wasn't close.

 

Completely agree. Problem is, it's hard for some to accept this until they get their heart broke by a paper.

I can say with complete honesty the only time I ever miss my newspaper time is Friday afternoons when I know I'd be sitting at home about to go cover a game. Then I leave work at 430 and go do whatever I want on Friday night and don't have to get up at 8 on Saturday morning to go to a cross country meet and feel a lot better.

 

A few years ago, I was out with my wife for her birthday and I got a call from the SE, who knew my plans for the night and he said, "They just signed someone. I need 14 inches on it within the hour."

I said, "This guy was not on a NFL roster last year. It's a brief. I'm in no position to write."

After having to get up from the table and argue with him for five minutes, I just said, "Just send me to the slot."

The second the slot answered he said, "Why don't I just write it up for you?" and I thanked him profusely. They ended up running it as the second brief.

At my first job one of the writers once told me, "If you ever go on vacation, tell them you're leaving the country, otherwise it won't stop them from calling you no matter how tiny the news is."

 

This is a true story? My God.