Dealing with creepy co-workers

So KG, now that we've got the office problem under control, please tell me you will recorda triple double every game for the Celts this winter!

 

"An apology to boot." You, sir, are a cunning linguist. Kudos.

KG, I agree with those who say to get something on the record ASAP. You have to make a paper trail in case it escalates. And then make it very clear to him that he's making you uncomfortable -- guys like this don't respond to subtlety.

 

Just have him killed. Sounds like no one will miss him.

 

DO NOT ask him "if you can help him with anything." You have no interest in helping him with anything. If he has problems, it's up to him to fix them.

"You are making me uncomfortable. Leave me alone."

And no, do not say "please." It's not a request.

 

Why, oh why, do we women in this day and age think we need to be nice when a good healthy dose of assertive bitchiness is called for?

KG, you've received some very good advice so far. You need to sit this guy down and tell him that his constant staring at you is out of line and must stop, that his flirting is out of line and must stop and he should not come any closer than four feet of you. He is to keep any and all conversation to work and work only.

Do this at work.

Do not worry about hurting his feelings, do not try to smooth it all over and sweep it under the rug. Do not think that you have to be nice because you have to work with him. It's a two-way street, missy, and socially-inept or not, he's making your work situation miserable.

Buck up, be a bitch (Babe In Total Control of Herself) and take control of the situation. You can do it, and let us know how it goes.

 

Yeah....what Rosie said.

But definitely say something to a supervisor or HR no matter what his response. Just to cover yourself. You never know. He could even decide to complain to HR about you. You want your story on record.

A quick story to illustrate the point. There was a woman who freelanced at one of my former stops who made some of the men in the office unfomfortable. Staring. Sitting as close as possible. Asking very personal questions (lucky for me, I wasn't one of her targets).

There was one married guy she was really bothering. One night it was pretty empty and he told the other sports guy present and myself that even though there was all kinds of room, she would plant herself right next to him.

Of course, he was right. He gave us this exasperated look. I know it wasn't cool, but we couldn't help but laugh.

Next thing I know, she's complaining to the higher ups about us making her uncomfortable and laughing at her. We told the whole story and my boss, stifling a grin, told us to just stay away from her.

Looking back, it really wasn't funny at all. Nobody had complained about this woman's behavior to that point and that left us particularly vulnerable to her complaints. The higher-ups just didn't know what she was doing.

 

KG, I would definitely talk with HR on this. At the very least, they can have a conversation with this guy from an objective third party standpoint, and that will also put them (and your supervisor) on notice to keep an eye on things.

Good luck.

 

Holy shit, that turned me on.

 

KG, I wouldn't take this lightly at all. I don't think the guy is getting the drift. If you don't want to talk to him directly, then go to your supervisor and talk to them about the situation. If you have a harrassment committee at your work go talk to someone there, because this clearly constitutes as harrassment. If not, then go to HR and talk to someone there. I would document time and place of each occurence that you have had with this guy because one of the things you will be asked for is proof. Also, if this guy is at all corresponding with you via email keep all hard copies. If none of these options work, get the police involved if it is really making you uncomfortable.

KG, I mentioned this in the stalker thread on this board previously (I think it was back in the spring), and on the journalism board yesterday. I had a manager stalk me for months at my workplace. I did all these steps and because he got caught, he threatened me. That's when I involved police and I hope I never go through this experience ever again in my life.

If you want to talk more about this, PM me. I hope this situation gets solved for you so work can be more enjoyable for you to go to, not creeped out by some psycho.