Daytona 500 Virgin

Been a while since I've been but second the garage mention if you have that access.

 

Sunscreen. Floppy hat.

The Daytona 500 is a blast from the build-up to the green flag...to about 30-50 laps in. Then it's hot, monotonous, boring, hot, crowded, boring drunkfest and all you can think about is getting out of there before 100,000 drunks get in their car and pack the road to the freeway.

Did I mention it's hot?

 

Shun the turkey legs.

 

Rent the scanners at the track, and get one for each person in your party. It can be rather entertaining listening to them during the race. Even during those stretches where not much is going on, you can listen in on the discussions, especially at Daytona where the spotter will be talking to the driver almost non-stop. Also, you can listen to the radio broadcast over the scanner, which makes the race itself easier to follow.

 

I should mention that a lady friend is taking me to the race. So I'm pretty sure that Lollipops is out.

I do plan to drink a ton but not so much that I think getting a tattoo of her face on my ass is a good idea.

 

Wear a Smokey Yunick hat.

I think you could pull that off, but you need the pipe, too.

 

That's a completely different thing then.

You'll be able to barter her for beads and margaritas in Turn 3.

 

You will never hear quite the same again.

 

It's a spectacle and you'll probably have mixed emotions about it after the trip.

Floppy hat, sunscreen (a bunch), ear plugs and money, for concessions. If you're drinking beer remember the lines will be long for the pissers.

If you never saw the Talladega Infield from the 1970s and 80s, today's infield resembles a church social. It looked like a Redneck Woodstock. Outside the track the few nights before the race weren't much different.

 

If you're drinking beer, take it in with you. The one saving grace of attending NASCAR races: You can take your own alcohol in.

 

My first NASCAR race was what was then the World 600 in Charlotte. My brother and I brought some good fried chicken and some bad beer and we sat practically on top of the track.

My headache lasted about two weeks.

 

What about a tattoo of her ass on your face? It'd be original, which would make it romantic.