Dane Cook, you're not funny

On the heels of Mr. Dane Cook's recent, long-winded display of his best comic wits on his HBO special (if you missed, don't worry, it's on at some point every freakin' day), I feel it is the right time to make this declaration: Dane Cook is not funny.

I don't know if anyone here thinks he is. For all I know, I'm preaching to the choir on this. If so, my bad.

Anyway, I'd never seen or heard any of Cook's material until his Monday night special. I had heard much about him, from his romancing of Jessica Simpson, to his fledging movie career and mostly about how funny his stand-up was.

Mostly, I was hearing this from high-school-aged kids, white girls and frat-boy types, so I generally dismissed all that jive. I wasn't like "Yo, I need to check this dude out right now."

But since he was on HBO and I pay $30 a month to have that shit and "Entourage" ain't on anymore, I figured I'd check out what the Great Dane was talking about. It was bland and predictable. I chuckled a few times. But none of his jokes have stuck in my head.

At least I understand the appeal. There's not really a young, good-looking white boy comic, who hits the general audience, not just the hillbilly crowd. Cook fills the need.

Just not the hype.

 

Is it bad to admit that I have no idea who he is and I would not recognize him in a lineup of you, me and him?

 

Naw, it's all good.

 

Imagine watching Ben Affleck in Gigli... just on stage.

 

Obviously not from the previous post, and I'd have to say well done at avoiding it.

I think the main reason he gets all the hype is he'll pretty much do anything to get an audience. Any chat show, any radio spot, feel free to call and he'll appear, which everyone appreciates and then hypes up what a great guy he is without mentioning his show is barely above average.

He's certainly no Eddie Izzard......

 

I found this out around a year ago when I discovered Dane Cook.

I was at a party -- actually I was kinda throwing the party -- and many 20somethings attended. One of them brought this Dane Cook DVD. All the other 20somethings were overjoyed that someone brought a Dane Cook DVD. So they gathered around to watch it after several drinks. And laughed and laughed and laughed.

I sat there. I looked at my friends who were helping throw the party. They looked at me. None of us laughed. Things we said, our jokes at the moment, were funnier than Dane Cook's jokes.

But he's more handsome than any of us, so that's why he wins.

 

I think you're right on with that. My girlfriend kinda liked him, cuz she thought he was hot. But I sat there thinking, damn, some of my homies tell better stories than this dude.

 

Yeah, he's definitely not up there with the dudes you named. But I was more specifically talking about younger whitey comics, which there's not that many of ... big ones at least.


On a sidenote:
It's funny to me to see so many people hating on Carlos Mencia these days. I understand it's cool to do. His show really isn't that good. But I saw him a few weekends ago in the Bay Area and he was hilarious as always doing his stand-up. A lot of the same types of people hatin on Carlos are the same ones trying to hype up Dane. I dunno. I don't get it.

 

I don't think Carlos Mencia OR Dane Cook is funny.

Dane Cook's HBO show sucked worse than anything I've ever tried to watch.

 

This piece makes some sense of it.


http://www.salon.com/ent/tv/review/2006/09/03/dane_cook/index.html

 

Worse than a George Bush press conference?

Worse than a 2005 Packers game?

 

Which immediately sets the odds at about 97% that his schtick consists of Kimmelesque snarky, snotty, snooty fratboy sniggering.

Just what the world needs absolutely no more of.