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Crossed Giblets of Death: The SJ Thanksgiving Family Therapy Thread

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by 21, Nov 22, 2006.

  1. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    Moddy, Idy, Webby, Gutty... can we sticky this through the weekend please?
  2. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    Needless to say, though, you'd never say that about 21's mother.
  3. 21

    21 Well-Known Member

    My mother does not rearrange cupboards.

    'Darling, do you still have that nice Guatamalan cleaning girl? The one with the deformity? I never saw such a large facial mole, she might have been quite lovely without it, she had such a large bosom, I wonder if the men overlook the mole because of the bosom....well, anyway, do you ever have her do the cabinets? I have my Greta take all the glassware out of the cabinets every month, and really clean everything. Maybe you should try a Polish girl, they really know how to clean, last month I had Greta stuff all of my summer blouses with tissue, do you ever stuff your blouses with tissue, dear? Do we have enough ice?'
  4. ...But, though the family looked all throughout the small Alpine village, Greta and the Guatemalan cleaning girl were nowhere to be found. Then, someone thought to look in the hayloft.
    "Hoo-hah!" exclaimed the lady of the house from the very top of the ladder.
    (To be continued.)
  5. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    I'd concede, but the weekend's early yet... havent had the T-day with the whole famn damily...
  6. 21

    21 Well-Known Member

    Hello, will you accept a collect call from...
    "LEEZA, pick up the damn phone, 21"
    Will you accept...

    I accept. My lot in life.

    "Why are you calling me collect? Mom called me collect, do the phones not dial out?"

    "Mom said we should call collect, she saw something on the Today show about outrageous phone rates at motels so she said we should just call collect because you can afford it."

    Note to self, find out if Matt Lauer's mother calls him collect.

    "So anyway.....Nikkola has poopies."

    "She has.....what? I'm sorry?"

    "Poopies....do I need to spell it out? DI-UH-REE-UH? Okay?"

    "Oh. Hm. Is she okay?"

    "They had to close the pool all day, you cannot believe how rude they were at this stupid motel, like she is the first three-year-old to have poopies in the pool."


    "So I need to know what you're making for dinner."

    "Let's see....Beef jerky, sushi, fluffernut sandwiches, saganaki....It's Thanksgiving, what do you think I'm making??"

    "Are you making macaroni & cheese for the kids?"

    "You told me fifty times to make macaroni & cheese for the kids, I will not let you down."

    "Don't make macaroni & cheese. It's bad for the poopies. She can eat the sushi, I'll pick off the rice for her. I gotta go, Emmah is opening all my tampons."
  7. Sam Mills 51

    Sam Mills 51 Well-Known Member

    Before this is over, 21 is going to make me glad I'm working and uninvolved in Turkey Day stuff.
  8. Buck

    Buck Well-Known Member

  9. Cadet

    Cadet Guest

    My cousin used to give her teething toddler tampons (the cardboard kind) to drool over. It was kind of funny to see, but you figure the kid can't really choke on it, since it has a string and all.
  10. "Across town, Waldo the pool boy didn't care. It was Thanksgiving and he was at work. He knew he was meant for better than this. He'd told the Guatemalan cleaning girl that the other night in the bar. He was an actor, a new Banderas, except without the stringy hair and the fat wife. He sighed and picked up the long pole with the net at the end of it.
    "Damn," he thought, bending to his work.
    (To be continued.)
  11. 21

    21 Well-Known Member

    My friend's dog died from eating a tampon. Lodged in the throat, swelled up just like it's supposed to. If you see your cousin over Thanksgiving, you might want to mention it.
  12. 21

    21 Well-Known Member

    See adds...this could be important detail.
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