Connecting the dots between sexy media guides and homophobia?

Tank top, basketball shorts and flip-flops exudes impressive

 

A bit off topic, but while a student assistant in my alma mater's Sports Information Department, one of my assignments was to put together the women's basketball guide one season.

I got along with the head coach well and when students returned to school in September I went by his office one day to talk about the media guide cover, see if he had any suggestions.

"Pencil Dick, I'm glad you stopped by," coach says. "I've been thinking about this media guide all summer."

Uh-oh.

"Follow me," he says, getting up and walking down the hallway.

We walk over to the women's team locker room, pass the dressing area and toward the bathroom stalls.

"Here's what I'm thinking," he says. "We've got our two best players back in (Player A) and (Player B). We'll put them in uniforms, have them come in here, pull down their shorts and sit on the toilet. That's our cover shot."

I am speechless.

"I've even come up with a slogan for you. You ready?"

By this time I'm already laughing.

"BUMBLEFUCK WOMEN'S BASKETBALL: WE AIN'T WORTH A SHIT!"

P.S. If I remember correctly, he was spot on with his prediction about the season, BTW.

 

Exactly! With the way they are lined up and the coach’s pose...

 

I didn't like the column, the initial concept of it isn't a bad one.

Several years ago, we were in the office and our columnist comes over and shows us the media guide of the two local Division I programs, both very successful. One was coached by a man and the other was coached by a woman who I don't know if was officially "out" but if she wasn't, it was the worst kept secret in the world.

In one guide the pictures were very tasteful, but the players have clearly been made up and have their hair done and what not.

In the other guide, the players were flexing and trying to look like badasses.

 

I've dealt with a women's basketball coach who was a lesbian and one of the best dressers I've ever seen. Come to think of it, I never saw her wear the same dress twice. Bad, bad column writing.

 

There are plenty of schools that use both sides of this as a recruiting tool.

"This is a very lesbian-friendly school."

"You won't have to worry about lesbians at this school."

 

That is the funniest thing I've read here since Bubbler's Wal-Mart at midnight.
Good stuff.

 

The only two schools in this country where you won't have to worry about lesbians is at Wabash and Hampden-Sydney.

 

And UConn and until recently, Penn State.

 

Actually, people at Penn State seemed to spend quite a bit of time worrying about lesbians with Portland there.

 

John Gagliardi says it's not a problem at St. John's either.

But they do have to separate the men from the boys with a crowbar in Collegeville.

 

The column may be a stretch; as has been said, dressing WBB players (and women athletes in particular) in fancy duds is old hat in media guides.

However, there's also a very, very clear reason why some women's basketball media guides conspicuously display many pictures of their school's coach, if it's a woman, with her husband and children if she's married and has a family.