Celebrating my "60th" birthday ...

The deal is, I turn 50 next week.

No great novelty – I think the baby boom peaked in 1957, so there are millions and millions of us.

I'd say I don't feel 50, but there are days when I do.

Anyway, inspiration struck me earlier this week ... I'm going to start lying about my age.

Not younger – older.

Wednesday is my 60th birthday. when I tell people how old I am, they're going to say, "Damn, he looks pretty good for 60."

Brilliant!

 

Happy birthday and congrats on the milestone.

Alas, we have a forced retirement policy, both here at [fill in name of your paper here] and SportsJournalists.com. You have five minutes before your desk is deposited into a shoebox and your account here is nuked.

Hey, can I have a piece of that cake?

 

Mmmmm, cake.

 

I knew the birthday cake would distract you from our kicking your 60-year-old ass outta here.

WTF? This isn't Carvel? Damn you! That's a fireable offense. Well, except for you.

 

You may be 50, but you post like you're 40

 

"You climb obstacles like old people fuck. Do you know that Private Pyle?"

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY HH!

 

Geez, Henry, don't you know 60 -- which JR and I are rapidly approaching and Casty has already hit -- is the new 40?

You're just a kid at 50.

 

Happy 50th, I am mailing you a box of Depends.

 

Coming from you, I know they will fashionably coordinate with the rest of my wardrobe.

 

happy 50, bro! my 50th us next month and i'm throwing myself a bash in july. i'm psyched!!

40 was a total bummer. 50? bring it on!! 8)

 

Hey, Henry! Where's the fucking party, man? You KNOW I'm down.

 

Damn, I thought you were at least 65.