Call your mom ...

and thank her. Because you could've had this sick bitch:

http://news.aol.com/topnews/articles/_a/mother-allegedly-offered-7-year-old-for/20070401145309990001?ncid=NWS00010000000001

TAYLOR, Mich. (April 1) - A 33-year-old woman faced arraignment Sunday on charges alleging she offered to let an undercover investigator take pornographic photos of her 7-year-old daughter and have sex with the girl, authorities said.

The woman was arrested Friday after taking the girl to a hotel in Romulus, near Detroit Metropolitan Airport, where she had agreed to meet the investigator, the Wayne County sheriff's department said.

Authorities said the woman offered to let the investigator take the photos for a fee and, when she met with him, discussed being paid in exchange for sex with the child, the Detroit Free Press reported.

"This is truly a horrifying case," Sheriff Warren Evans said in a statement. "To think that a woman would offer up her own daughter in this way impossible to comprehend."

 

A bridge over deep water, a burlap sack and a ton of bricks would be too good for that woman.

I'm thinking she would be dropped into the ocean near a known shark population (like the Farallon Islands off the California coast) along with 100 gallons of chum.

 

You have succeeded in making me nauseous. Thanks.

And the shark death is too quick for this woman. We need something slower. More painful.

 

I wonder how many cops who work child abuse/sex crimes are raging alcoholics? There's no way I could go undercover on a job like that and not be totally screwed up by what I would see on a regular basis.

 

Starman, please pick up the white courtesy phone. Starman to white courtesy phone.

 

Tie her upside down to a tree with her hands tied behind her back and place her head in a burlap sack with rabid rats?

 

Just in case there are any lingering questions about the validity of these claims, here's video of from CNN with more details:

http://www.cnn.com/video/player/player.html?url=/video/law/2007/04/02/wxyz.mom.offers.child.sex.affl

And I'm thinking tied up and placed, naked, between a couple of extra large fire ant beds for about, oh, a day or so. And then to get rid of the ants, fire.

 

Anything that takes less than, say, a year to kill her is too nice.

Do the North Korea-James Bond scorpion venom thing from now until Spring Break 2008.

Then just push her off the top of a tall building.

 

Fire ants. I like the idea of fire ants.



(well, for this woman.)

 

How do we know this 7-year-old isn't demonstraightably, provable hot ... or whatever it is JDV says? .... My phone just rang. It was hell confirming my reservations.