"Bully" and the R/PG-13 controversy

Seems like bullying is in the news everywhere lately.

I subscribe to the notion that you have to set the tone with a targeted anti-bullying curriculum early in the school system. If you wait until the kids are in junior high to start telling them to be nice to each other, it's really too late.

 

Exactly. Hell, preschool. Hell, day care.

I read about a study where a psychologist said that the most aggressive, violent human beings are toddlers. He said that the only reason they don't kill each other is because we don't give them guns and knives. Lots of teachable moments from the start.

We wouldn't expect kids in middle school to grasp geometry and algebra without a strong foundation in basic arithmetic. But with this, they're just supposed to get it. Makes no sense.

 

I suppose I can only speak for my school district as well as the ones where my mom and sister teach -- which encompasses three districts in three different states -- but based on that I think you guys might be making an assumption that isn't true about the lessons starting too late. We have had an anti-bullying program in place starting in first grade with all-school assemblies, guest speakers, classroom books and lessons, playground supervision, etc.

Fact of the matter is, though, middle school is where it ramps up. The hormones and mood swings, the lack of a homeroom structure, cultural influences, kids getting Facebook accounts ... whatever the reasons, that's still the place where it manifests itself most and that's where it needs to be addressed with the most immediacy.

 

I agree that it needs to start earlier. The most intense period of bullying for me was in Grades Four and Five. I started Grade Six in a new school where I wasn't popular but wasn't a pariah either.

 

Sounds like your school district is doing it right. I wasn't trying to imply that nobody was.

I was just saying that if you haven't laid that foundation in primary school, then the results of anti-bullying campaigns later in life are pretty dismal.

 

Well, yeah, that is undeniably true.

Anyway, to the movie, I think I will probably take my 12-year-old to it even if it stays rated R. I mean, he was just telling me anyway about all the kids in school who curse all day. And he did hear me (when I forgot he was home) yell "HOLY SHIT!!!!!" when Alex Smith ran in that touchdown against the Saints.

 

No assumption here that lack of action is universal. What I'm saying is that what is going on at these schools you mention is what needs to happen everywhere.

It's tough. You can't watch them 24 hours a day, as teachers or parents. And seventh- and eighth-graders know everything. Everything. Throw in some social self-doubt for kicks, and the age is just toxic.

Not to blame the victims, but the bullied kids - not the ones getting the shit beat out of them for being small or smart, but some others - also must learn how to deal with good-natured teasing that might get out of hand if they feed it. It's OK to have a shortcoming. The most I can remember being teased was in seventh or eighth grade when I kept insisting, just absolutely insisting, that I was good at basketball. Just couldn't let it go. Of course, the situation spiraled out of control. All I had to do to stop 25 boys from pounding on my lack of self-awareness was, right from the start, make some joke about how, yep, I sure did suck. What are you going to do? But at age 13 or 14, it's so damned hard to cede that alpha male ground like that and be sure enough in your own skin to say, out loud, "Yeah, I suck at this."

 

"Bully" gets a PG rating in Canada.

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/arts/movies/bullying-film-gets-pg-rating-in-canada/article2368310/

 

One of the more idiotic Facebook posts I've seen:

"That girl you called a slut in class today...I seen her fuckin a kid from special ed last week. The pregnant girl walking down the street...She took on five different dudes in a week and is looking forward to an appearance on Maury in 9 months. The boy you called lame...Called the cops on mi fren two weeks ago for smoking a blunt. That girl you pushed down the other day...She deserved that shit because she gave your fren crabs. That girl you called fat...She just ate six Twinkies and washed it down with a pint of Ben & Jerry's. The old man you made fun of cause of the ugly scars...He got'em when he jumped out a glass window trying to escape Chris Hansen from Dateline. The boy you made fun of for crying...He's a fuckin lil pussy and cries over everything. You think you know them. Guess what? You don't! Like if you're sick of our weak-ass society where bullying is such an issue."

Is this guy seriously trying to make the point that sometimes it really is the victim's fault?
I'm so sick of hearing people complain how soft and politically correct society is.
I know it's a tough world and maybe kids need to learn that, but come on, how about a little compassion for some of these people?

 

This crap shows just how much of a joke the MPAA is. I'm taking both my kids to see it.

 

That trailer looked good to me, and I too would like to take my kids (seventh grade boy, fifth grade girl) to see it. If language is the only reason for an "R" rating, I would consider it, especially for my son.

 

You and Roger Ebert are in lock-step on this one:
http://blogs.suntimes.com/ebert/2012/03/even_as_i_write_on.html