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Best quotes

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by Drip, Sep 6, 2008.

  1. joe_schmoe

    joe_schmoe Active Member

    After a question was asked about his team's inept passing game coach answers:

    "Our quarterback was fine. You can't fault him for the receivers not being 8-feet tall. Unfortunately, I don't anticipate any joining the team this week either. I'll check with (our basketball coach) and see what he has though."
     
  2. Drip

    Drip Active Member

    Late Henderson State coach Ralph ‘Sporty’ Carpenter had an outstanding one-liner. I'll set it up. The date was November 5, 1977. Carpenter’s Henderson Reddies were unbeaten and ranked No. 1 in NAIA's Division I poll. UAM was 2-6-1.
    The Boll Weevils, led by All-America tailback Terry Alexander, defeated the Reddies. 23-10. Alexander rushed for 253 and 3 touchdowns.
    Afterwards, a disappointed Carpenter explained the loss by saying "Lightnin’ struck the outhouse, and we were in it."
     
  3. e_bowker

    e_bowker Member

    Not nearly as famous as others, obviously, but I covered a Juco game last weekend and the coach made me laugh. His team got beat 31-3, and after a few of the basic "we stunk" quotes, I asked him if there's anything they did well.
    Coach thinks for a minute, and says, "Maybe we punted well? I'd have to check the stats."
     
  4. HC

    HC Well-Known Member

    Paul Maurice

    "If [a tie] is like kissing your sister, we're just going to have to marry the girl because this is getting to be obscene."
     
  5. crimsonace

    crimsonace Well-Known Member

    Still my favorite:
    "Coach Knight, how did you get Lindeman to play so well tonight?"
    "Well, we took his balls, put them in a vise, squeezed it real tight, stuck a red-hot poker up his @$$ and poured hot water down his throat. We told him if he played well, we wouldn't do it again."

    He was a first-grade a-hole, but he could be funny when in the right mood.
     
  6. crimsonace

    crimsonace Well-Known Member

    I can't remember who said it, but ...
    "Coach, what do you think about your team's execution tonight?"
    "I'm all in favor of it."

    One of my colleagues went up to Marshall Faulk when he played for the Colts. He was in one of those moods where he never talked after a game, and he made himself available. The scrum had broken up, he goes walking right up to him and says "Marshall, how was your line." (he said he was throwing him a softball, trying to get him to say something complimentary to open him up).

    Faulk, who had a bad game in a loss to the Patriots said (with a sarcastic tone): "The holes were there all day. I just didn't run through them."
     
  7. sportsgopher

    sportsgopher Member

    "We've overcome a lot of diversity on this team this year."
     
  8. imjustagirl

    imjustagirl Active Member

    "It just seems like some guys have separated themselves throughout the Chase, and it's been anti-dramatic, I guess you could say." - Denny Hamlin, dropping knowledge.
     
  9. budcrew08

    budcrew08 Active Member

    The execution quote is from John McKay, former Tampa and USC coach.
     
  10. budcrew08

    budcrew08 Active Member

    Denny stinks. Not to threadjack, but how much of a dick is Tony Stewart?
     
  11. imjustagirl

    imjustagirl Active Member

    Depends on the day. Tony was really good to me at times. I've also seen him be a complete douche. He was apparently off the douche scale Sunday at Richmond.
     
  12. budcrew08

    budcrew08 Active Member

    oh yeah.
     
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