Best quotes

Abe Lemons following a particularly galling SWC loss: "What does it say about a 50-year-old man whose living depends on an 18-year-old making a 15-foot jump shot?"

Navy senior master chief aboard the USS Coral Sea as it finishes its final deployment and heads for mothballs. Teddy Kennedy has the week before disparaged the ship — in the eyes of the crew — in an attack on the Reagan defense policy. Kennedy called the mothballing of the ol' steam pusher an indication of how out of touch Dutch and his boys were. Kennedy believed it should have been done sooner.

"What the Senator fails to understand, young man, is this ship may be old but it floats a helluva lot better than his car ever did."

Never made the wire. Pussies at NYGen refused to move it.

 

From a gamer in January. The team I cover sucked for two periods but played well in the third. Enjoy:

And from what COACH said after the game, it sounded like he told his team that same message during the second intermission, albeit a bit more loudly. COACH said his team got a “swift kick in the (butt)” between periods.
“We’ve all had that in our day at some point in time,” COACH said. “I was raised old school and, not that my parents beat me, but I understand what a licking is. I know that’s not politically correct in today’s society, but I wasn’t raised in today’s society.”

(Names have been changed to protect the guilty.)

 

One of my all-time favorites.

 

"Fastball, about cock high"

- Long ago Arkansas Traveler on the pitch he hit for a game-winning home run. Friend of mine got that quote but his paper didn't use it for some reason.

 

From my college days covering Big 10 baseball, talking to the team's catcher while his team was riding a hot hitting streak: "We've been hitting piss-missiles all over the place."
God I loved college newspapers.... only place I've ever gotten fuck and shit in the paper.

 

"Have another donut, you fat pig." -- Then New Jersey Devils Head Coach Jim Schoenfeld to referee Don Koharski.

 

Two great ones from Jim Leyland, courtesy of Charley Steiner's XM radio show:

On a naive young player: "He's not smart enough to know he's not very smart."

AND

When telling a player he'd just been sent to the minors: "The circus is leaving town and we're leaving the clowns behind."

 

Two of the favorites I got:
Background: Oklahoma State beat Cal-State fullerton to win an NCAA Regional at Starkville and advance to the College World Series. When the final out was made, OSU CF Anthony Blackmon mooned the Miss. State fans in the Left Field Lounge, who, according to outspoken OSU coach Gary Ward had been yelling racial slurs at Blackmon for four days.

Ward on the situation: "Mississippi State has some of the best fans in the country, but it also has some fans who need mental enemas."

Background: I was covering Kentucky and Eric Kelly, UK's best cover cornerback, broke his hand in 2-a-days and was practicing with a big cast on his hand and wrist. After practice one day, I asked him a pretty simple question.

Me: "What's it been like playing with a cast on your hand?"
EK: Sitting down, looks up at me, looks at other reporters, looks up at sky, rubs chin, thinks, then, slowly, says: "It's like, man, it's like...maaann.. man, it's like, man, it's like playing with a cast on your hand."

 

Had a couple of good ones today from a visiting lacrosse coach, whose team whipped up on Hometown High this afternoon.

First on the win
"We're happy. We're going to go home, eat some food and keep being happy."

Second on his team's defense of Hometown's only scoring threat.
"What we did is what we do."

 

A couple favorites from working at my JC paper:

"Don't worry, C.J. will be back. I ain't bullshittin'." — Point guard named C.J.

"We're gonna whoop they ass, go to Tacoma and whoop they ass, then we're going to the playoffs." — Shooting guard after team needed 2 wins on road to make NWAACC playoffs

And from my first daily feach:

"It's a gentleman's sport where you beat the crap out of people." — HS kid on lacrosse

 

"It was a good game, both teams played hard."
-- Rasheed Wallace.

 

From today, a high school coach: "I mean this with no disrespect whatsoever, because I’m not disrespectful … Asian golfers are very good."