Best quotes

From a not-so-bright highschooler in Verbena, Ala., many moons ago: "I came around da corna and saw him. Hell, I nu a had heeyum. I juked him out his dam pantz."

 

Not to me, but to a former colleague who interviewed a football coach preparing his team to play against the deaf high school. He said this without a hint of irony, I'm told: "I've got to be honest, I don't know anything about this team. We're going into this game blind."

 

A blind man ain't got no business at a circus.

 

Tony Elliott, New Orleans Saints, after the Saints won their third straight to open the season, albeit unimpressively, in '88 (the year after the first playoff appearance).

"We haven't beat the point spread yet, but I'm happy as a punk in Boy's Town."

 

Local low-major basketball team trails by 5 with 2 seconds left. Hits a 3, and forces a 5-second call. On the ensuing inbounds pass, local team gets off a good look at a 3-pointer, but it rims out.

Postgame, I ask the visitor's leading scorer what he thought when the 3-pointer left the shooter's hand.

"Oh, F---"

We didn't run it, but I think it summed up his sentiments perfectly.

 

This from a sophomore high school basketball player last year:

"The reason we have been giving up points is because they have been scoring."

 

asked a HS wrestler how it felt to have the season he was - he was undefeated at the time on his way to finishing second at state.

"it's nice to look out there and know you can beat up everybody" or something to that effect.

 

Big Ten qb at a team camp giving a speech to high schoolers: "Excellence is good."

 

"The ship be sinking" -- Micheal Ray Richardson

"Sometimes it just bes that way" -- Super John Willimason

"Rickey don't need no media"-- the incomparable Rickey.

 

"Whoopty-damn-doo" - Derrick Coleman

 

From earlier this year, a high school wrestler, after winning his first state title.
"Man, I'm so excited right now. I can't tell you how good I feel about winning. How high is the sky? Damn, How high is the sky? That's how good this feels."
We ran it without the damn.

 

A guy was trying to do a sidebar on PGA players who play awful in a round -- how does a pro feel when he just hits it sideways all day. So Frank Beard shoots an 80 and this guy walks up to him in the locker room and explains the premise of the story. Beard listens politely, looks up and utters a two-word answer. "F--- golf."