Best mug shot ever...

I don't have the mugshot online, but my friend was once arrested dressed as an Oompa Loompa, orange facepaint and all. I'm just sayin'.

 

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-do
I have a perfect puzzle for you
Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-dee
If you are wise, you'll listen to me

What do you get when you patronize whores?
Sucking and fucking behind closed doors
But blowing your load is messy and quick
Don't you wish you had checked ... for ... dick?

No it doesn't mean you're gay.

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-da
If you're not lustful, you will go far
You will live in happiness too
Like the Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do

 

What. In. The. World?

 

I figured pern's friend was arrested for solicitation (why not?), and I offered an Oompa Loopa song for the occasion.

Boy am I tired. I need to go to bed.

 

It's even BETTER if you made it up!

I bow in your general direction.

 

Totally ... love the Wonka people.

 

It was a DUI, but that song was gold. I think the story will forever be changed to recognize your genius, CI.