Baring his soul (and everything else) for the Lions UPDATED

Neither are the Fords, unfortunately

 

And with Ford Jr. stepping down at Ford, he'll have even more time to help hurt the Lions.

 

Cullen suspended for first game.

http://www.detnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060908/SPORTS0101/609080356/1126

So Marinelli, the raw rookie head coach who has never even been a position coach before, will now, in his first regular-season game as a head coach, in addition to running the game overall, have to devote attention himself to coaching the defensive line.

Terrific. So the excuses are all set up ahead of time.

 

Actually, he has been a position coach before (even for five years in the NFL too).


But of course, the Lions have no mention of Cullen being suspended on their web site. Apparently they can only print good news there, which explains why it's mostly blank.




Marrinelli's Coaching History
Detroit Lions 2006
Head Coach 2006

Tampa Bay Buccaneers 1996-2005
Asst. Head Coach/Defensive Line 2002-05
Defensive Line 1996-01

Southern California 1995
Defensive Line 1995

Arizona State 1992-94
Asst. Head Coach/Defensive Line 1992-94

California 1983-91
Asst. Head Coach/Defensive Line 1990-91
Defensive Line 1983-89

Utah State 1976-82
Defensive Line 1976-81
Offensive Line/Special Teams 1982

Rosemead (San Gabriel Valley, Calif.) High School 1973-75
Assistant Coach 1973-75

 

Oh, I know he was a position coach before. In fact, that's all he was. (Although, from all reports, a very good one.)

Not to say that means he won't be a successful head coach. But you might think, in an intelligently-run organization, you wouldn't want your new head coach, in his first regular-season game ever, to have to devote his attention to anything than his overall coaching duties.

Just suppose one or two particular members of the defensive line start getting worked over like rag dolls, and Marinelli the expert DL coach (which, granted, he was) has to suddenly devote attention to individual technique, positioning, etc etc. At the same time, some situation develops requiring Marinelli to decide, say, whether to go for it on fourth down, whether to accept or decline penalties, whether or not to throw his challenge flag, blah blah.

Of course, considering the fact that Cullen, in the first place, was by all appearances utterly unqualified as an NFL position coach (from being a Graduate Assistant on the lowest-of-the low-rung Big Ten teams to an NFL staff position?? You gotta be shitting me), the Lions will probably get dramatically-improved DL coaching in the deal. At the same time, their Head Coach may be too wrapped up dinking around coaching the DL, that the game as a whole goes down the toilet.

Oh well, another wonderful week in Millenland.

 

FWIW, the only reason he was serving as a grad assistant was because of his alcohol-related firing at Ole Miss. It's not like he's just starting out in the business or has never been a position coach before.

 

The third time in his career he's been "busted down" (gone from coordinator from position coach, or position coach to graduate assistant).

IF, that is, you take his posted resume as accurate, which at this point would be quite, quite a stretch.

No matter how you cut it, not exactly a glitteringly-qualified candidate, which calls into deep question Marinelli's staff-assembly skills, and even MORE into question the judgment of Millen in allowing Marinelli (never responsible for assembling a staff before in his life) to handle the entire hiring process himself, without even the most cursory review (any idiot with five free minutes on Google would have found the stories about Cullen's firing, and the $437,000 lawsuit he filed against Mississippi afterward).

Of course, the judgment of Millen can usually be called into question about 937 times in any given day, starting the first thing in the morning when he forgets to take his pajama bottoms off before sitting down on the toilet to take a shit. That's OK though -- he isn't the one who has to do the laundry.

 

Ahhh, why not.

The four most satisfying words in the English language: "I Told You So."



Wonder what was Cullen's hold on Marinelli/Millen?

My guess is Cullen knew where to get bargain prices on king-size boxes of Kleenex.

 

My thoughts exactly. As long as he doesn't get out of the vehicle, doesn't he have the right to drive in his birthday suit?

 

LOL!

 

A thread this old deserves a callback to the best Halloween outfit ever:

 

I've never seen Jon Kitna smile before. He's usually frowning and blaming his interceptions on someone else.