Bad B.O. forces emergency landing

Since when does bad B.O. equate to flatulence?
Notice the paragraph I put in bold...

http://www.tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20061205/NEWS01/612050361

Tuesday, 12/05/06
Flatulence, not turbulence, forces plane to land
Passenger lighted matches to hide odor

By SAMUEL SHU
For The Tennessean

Flatulence brought 99 passengers on an American Airlines flight to an unscheduled visit to Nashville early Monday morning.

American Flight 1053, from Washington Reagan National Airport and bound for Dallas/Fort Worth, made an emergency landing here after passengers reported smelling struck matches, said Lynne Lowrance, a spokeswoman for the Nashville International Airport Authority.


The plane landed safely. The FBI, Transportation Safety Administration and airport authority responded to the emergency, Lowrance said.

The passengers and five crew members were brought off the plane, together with all the luggage, to go through security checks again. Bomb-sniffing dogs found spent matches.

The FBI questioned a passenger who admitted she struck the matches in an attempt to conceal body odor, Lowrance said. The woman lives near Dallas and has a medical condition.

The flight took off again, but the woman was not allowed back on the plane.

"American has banned her for a long time," Lowrance said.

She was not charged but could have been. While it is legal to bring as many as four books of paper safety matches onto an aircraft, it is illegal to strike a match in an airplane, Lowrance said.

 

I suppose this means I should shower before flying out to Toronto tomorrow?

 

Shower's optional, but having a liverwurst-and-lentil chimichanga for dinner and washing it down with a twelve of Molson would not be the best pre-flight strategy.

 

At least bring a dog along so you can blame him.

 

50 or Red Cap would be the beer of choice with that meal.

 

Although i have no idea what a chimichanga is, if I'm having a liverwurst on rye sandwhich (a personal favourite), I think a Red Stripe would go down well with it as well.

 

"Matches on a Plane!"

Coming to a thee-ater near you.

 

Jerry: Do you smell that?

Elaine: What am I, hard of smelling?

 

I wish that I could come up with a better euphemism than "she had a medical condition". Perhaps she had excess gaseous formation in her nether region?