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Arizona State men's basketball vs. Washington State - looking for critiques

Discussion in 'Writers' Workshop' started by bourq25, Apr 4, 2017.

  1. bourq25

    bourq25 New Member

    Please critique my Arizona State men's basketball game story I wrote for The Arizona Republic as a freelance reporter while covering the Sun Devils after they lost at Washington State University in good ol' Pullman. If anyone wants to do so, I totally appreciate your time.

    By the way, I should have posted this back in February, as opposed to right after Gonzaga lost to North Carolina in the championship game. Better late than never.

    Washington State runs away from Arizona State basketball

    Thanks,
    Bruce Bourquin
    Coeur d'Alene, Idaho ~ near Spokane, Wash.
     
  2. cisforkoke

    cisforkoke Well-Known Member

    I thought it read well for the most part. But there were a couple of places with quotes where I had to jump back to figure out what the original reference was. For example:

    “It’s nice to think about now, but that didn’t happen,” Arizona State head coach Bobby Hurley said of what a win could have meant. The part about the win streak was separated from the quote.

    Also, too many pop-up ads.
     
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