Are you there, God? It's me, Killick

I believe faith is about a choice. I choose to believe, even when I'm engulfed by my doubts.
Anyone who claims they don't doubt is either lying or has a level of faith I can't even fathom.
Keep looking, Killick. Maybe you'll find what you're looking for. I believe it makes God happy when we are trying to figure it out, even if we're not finding the right path.
You'll get there if you just keep trying.

 

To clarify the first part of my post, I mean I choose to believe even through my periods of doubt. That doubt always subsides.
I'm intellectual enough that I wouldn't stick with the faith if I just couldn't ever believe it.

 

Killick, I'm catholic, and I've gone through nearly exactly the same thing.

When I moved here, however, as strange as this may sound, a church found me.
My neighbors below me, the cute looking girls, sigh, went to the school there and I met in the span of 2 weeks at least 4 other people who was going there, I even went on a date with a girl (before my neighbors moved in) who was working for one of the financial directors of the same church.

So I started going to their church, and in a way it helped me get through being away from everyone around the holidays and some other stuff I was going through. It changed me, but I feel guilty because I've stopped all of it, again.

Once my neighbors told me, "you're a good guy Jake, but we don't want to hang out with you" because of something stupid I did, my faith all together ended, it seems.
It shoudln't take other people to keep my faith alive, but in a way it really did.
But then, at the same time,

I stopped going to their non-denominational church when lent came around because I was confused. I'd go to their church and every week they'd bend or break a lot of the catholic traditions, and for some reason it bothered me. The little things like they'd say certain prayers with different wording, and they had this prayer about finding money and being mailed random checks, before which the ministers would talk about how so and so found $500 in his mailbox last week or something like that that really made me uncomfortable.

So I started going to Catholic church and it reminded me of home, which was nice. But then I just, stopped.
My catholic faith is strong, when its awake, but lately it just seems to not be there. I really don't have any good reason for NOT going other then I just haven't.
But, just talking about it maybe will get me to start going again. (The Catholic pastor here is a real young guy that you can hardly understand at times, but that's never kept me from going. He seems nice enough.) I was happier after going to services than I was before, always.

 

Lapsed Catholic, not really hung up about it. Just try to be good to others and work as hard as I can and be at peace with myself. I'd say I still have a lot of Catholic in me (tho I've always hated Notre Dame)

 

I agree. Pallister, that was outstanding.

 

Killick,

You situation regarding being a lapsed Catholic (or Baptist or Presbyterian or I supposed Muslim or whatever) is pretty common.

Folks tend to stray away in college and come back later.

Good luck. I was in your shoes.

I have found friends, a chance to help people, and have learned a lot. Good environment for the kids, too, so I have no complaints.

Also have been involved with and taught Sunday School classes -- which in my limited knowledge of the Catholic church I don't believe they have. I think those are good ways to really get to know some people in the church.

Good luck.

If you want to know what you should do, just talk to God. He will answer. I usually don't like the answer, though. Awful lot of work.

 

Dools -- I've done that all along (just try to be good to others, practice C-ism without the church, etc), and until lately that seemed enough for me. Though it may not be the best reason for my return to church, I think comfort is a big reason... just wanting to find something familiar, comforting, home. But I do want to have the faith I see others enjoy. Maybe its my inherent doubts, or the cynicism that comes from working in a newsroom, I dunno, but it just seems so hard to just reach out and grab it.

 

Killick,

I struggle with my faith almost daily. If you don't wrestle with your beliefs, they're probably not worth having.

Beyond that, I'd listen carefully to those on this thread who have been hurt by churches or church groups. It's the great failing of American Christianity, of mankind of course, all this pain, and I've been on the receiving (and, regretfully, giving) end of such behavior in my life. I've said and heard the phrase "some Christian you are." It hurts equally to say and hear.

But, most importantly, it's beside the point. The home base of Catholicism or most Christian denominations isn't any ritual, priest, any adult group, or tithing. It's Jesus, and the Bible. In Christian teaching, that "longing" you feel is actually Christ purusing your spirit, praying for you as the father prayed for the return of the prodigal son. A lot of people walk around that reality, or, Joel Osteen-style, reduce it to "Jesus will find you a parking spot." In reality, the longing is for something far more monumental than that, and the pursuit is, too.

 

I mean for adults.

 

From the Muslims.

 

Well I had heard that the Catholic church wasn't big on Sunday School for adults and I figured if you gotta abstain to be a priest or a nun you don't want some wahoo with a trophy wife steppin' on your turf.

I stand corrected. It's the Mormon's I'm really worried about.

 

Mine is. Most of the church members attend Sunday School as well.