And now, my muscles are seizing from sunburn

I hate you. That is all.

 

Is that Kimbo Slice, Mike?

 

Google tells me it's Larry Hisle. I'm not one to go against Google.

 

Sunburns suck.

The worst one I ever had came after and all-day trek across Six Flags. Put some sunscreen on in the morning and then forgot all about it.

Girlfriend was peeling skin off my back for two weeks. Yeah. That gross.

Not to mention, this was only in the third month of us being "offically together". What a way to kick start a relationship.

One of my best female friends has this to say everytime I talk about the experience: "Oh shut the f*ck up you p*ssy. Your stupid sunburn ruined our fun."

Apparently she wasn't a fan of my complaining like a little girl the whole way home.

 

Screw you! Just kidding (kind of).

 

i'm the same way, cadet: turn into a nice shade of brown after a day.

 

See above, Songbird.

 

Seriously, Bubbs, I thought you were smarter than this.

If you admit "I got an honorary degree from The University of Helsinki for my whiteness." and still get lobstered, I got no sympathy for ya.

 

Get some of that aloe vera gel, and stick it in the frige. When it cools off, apply, and enjoy the sensation.

From the neck up, and knees and elbows down, I could pass for a different nationality. I need a recumbent farmer tan pose.

 

what am i looking for jakey?

 

So you wanna screw both me and Xan? Kinky.

 

Pour white vinegar on a paper bag and use it as a poultice on the afflicted area(s).

Strange, but it works.