And my teenage daughter thinks I'm tough on her boyfriends...

Serve it up, knock it down.

 

No, because (and I should be thankful for this so far), they've all been under 21.

 

Good friend of mine was in the Army for 8 years and was involved in both the Gulf War and the conflict in Panama. He also has three teenage daughters. Every time that one of his girls has a date with a new boy, he takes the boy to the basement and shows him his "war room". He starts with the souvenirs. Then the medals and Purple Heart. And then his gun collection.

Works like a charm.

 

What if Boots appeared at your door for a date with your daughter?

 

That's the point. If the kid says yes you throw him out on his ass.

 

Cover her ass

 

Really?

Then why be a dick and offer him a beer if the gesture's not genuine?

 

It's a test, JR. If a guy is dumb enough to fall for it, then aside from not knowing how to behave properly, he is also too stupid for the daughter.

This is simply my interpretation. My little one is far too young for me to have to try this one out yet.

 

The stupid father who comes up with this kind of "test" is the one who doesn't know how to behave properly.

That's trailer trash hospitality.

 

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,288910,00.html

 

In a similar vein, I was told this story (no, it didn't happen to me) while visiting the in-laws: Daughter brings home date to meet the parents.

Daughter's dad: "Hey, Johnny, you know the difference between a steer and a bull?"

Boyfriend: "Well, sir, as a matter of fact I don't."

Daughter's dad: "A bull is a full-grown male cow. A steer's been castrated. Screw around with my daughter, and you'll be considered a steer."

On another note, I dated a girl in HS whose dad was supposedly a sharpshooter in the military back when. Needless to say, I didn't take many chances.

 

Hondo, in 10 years, she'll appreciate how you were able to read the potential beaus and sort out the ones who are a safe pick.

I have two questions about this story: after the kid was beaten up with a pool cue, why not get the hell out of the house and run like the dickens? Secondly, any old man would have envisioned themselves sticking a boy six feet under, but holy damn, why put the kid in a wheelchair? Shove a pool cue up in his ass would have done the trick?