A nice problem to have (you're welcome, IJAG)

Oh Buddy Christ. It's nice to see you again

 

Hey, those are Buddy Christ's words.

Just because my virginity is just about back at full strength, doesn't mean I recommend the celibate lifestyle. I just have no prospects. And no money.

 

See if you can work out a "manual labor for sex" deal with a hooker. Maybe she needs her fence painted.

And that's not a euphemism.

 

And of course, where was my mind? In the gutter. Wait a minute. Maybe that's where I can find the hooker. ...


By the way, PhilaYank, go with option No. 1. And are you planning on popping the question there or not? I just got the impression it was in the plans by "the probable future-Mrs. PhilaYank. ..." By the way, please let her keep her last name. PhilaYank isn't too becoming on a lady.

Take that in whichever way you want.

 

"Fence? You said fence?"

 

IJAG's right

 

BYH and Mike are so cute together. They're our own Mike Damone and Mark Ratner.

 

First of all Mike, you never let on how much you like a girl. "Oh, Sportschick. Hi." Two, you always call the shots. "Text me. You won't regret it." Now three, act like wherever you are, that's the place to be. "Isn't this message board great?" Four, when ordering food, you find out what she wants, then order for the both of you. It's a classy move. "Now, the lady will have the linguini and white clam sauce, and a Coke with no ice." And five, now this is the most important, Mark. When it comes down to making out, whenever possible, put on side one of Night Ranger's Midnight Madness.

 

That's gold, Jerry. Gold!

 

Oh, good God.

 

I woke up in a great mood. I don't know what the hell happened.

 

That's a mighty nice forest green hatchback you have there, Beej. Why the cardboard on the door?