A new take on Ferris Bueller

John Hughes always had to throw in a total "buzz kill" moment in his movies.

 

I thought he was scattered, smothered and covered [/wafflehouse]

 

What's next? That St. Elsewhere was all Ricky Schroder's imagination?

 

So he made himself make a phony phone call?

 

I always figured it went like this:
Cameron, still full of piss and vinegar, stands up to Morris when he gets home. Morris, not used to backing down, doesn't this time either. He stands his ground and rips into Cameron. Calls him a worthless piece of shit, says he wishes Cameron had never been born, grounds him, maybe hits him.
Cameron, shattered both by his father's insults and the destruction of his newfound courage, retreats to his room and lays on the bed. He stares at the ceiling for what seems like hours. Neither parent comes in to talk to him, and he finally realizes that he is simply a nuisance to them. Totally devastated now, he goes to his dad's gun safe and pulls out a museum-quality shotgun. He quietly slips into his parents bedroom and shoots them both in their sleep before putting the gun under his own chin and pulling the trigger.

Maybe that's in the deleted scenes on the 30th anniversary DVD?

 

"Now with a Very Special Ending!"

 

Had another thought on my alternate Cameron ending...
Instead of shooting himself, Cameron just slumps down on the floor. Still a gutless wonder, he can't pull the trigger. As he sobs to himself in his dead parents' bedroom, the screen goes black. The next scene is of him laying on another bed, this time in a gray shirt rather than his Red Wings jersey. As the camera pulls back, we see him laying on a prison bunk.
Turns out FBDO was all a flashback to the day Cameron's life was ruined by his impulsiveness. How's that for a life lesson, kiddies? At the very least, it'd be the greatest shock and buzzkill ending of all time.

 

Fuck, I don't want to <i>think</i> about Ferris Bueller.

 

"Call me sir, Gawd-dammit"

 

Another additional scene:
We got to see Ferris "get home," what about Sloane? I think, right before Cameron's scene, there should be one with her pulling up to her house, bopping in the front door, throwing her keys on the table. She continues on to her room, where she closes the door and begins to undress, back to the camera. Guys are getting a little turned on as she's now completely naked... then she turns around and "untucks." As "Goodbye Horses" plays, she dances around the room. "I'd f*ck me so hard."

EDIT: Now THERE'S your "sausage king."

 

So if Ferris is all a dream, what with the sister and the principal and all that? Why would Cameron be imagining that?

And if you want to talk about someone sexually abusing a kid, I'm making the principal suspect No. 1.

 

http://www.riverblue.com/hughes/sounds/gohome.wav