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A Cubs prospect and me tearing a gas hose from its pump

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by CentralIllinoisan, Apr 11, 2009.

  1. CentralIllinoisan

    CentralIllinoisan Active Member

    Gassing up the car today, when I have to take a monster piss. Unable to wait for the car to fill, I run into the station.

    While on my way out, my sister calls my cell. She says her red, 1995 Buick Skylark had sold -- and the classified ad she put in the paper no longer needed to run.

    "I sold it to a guy and his son," she says. "Some 18-year-old kid out here from California. He plays with the (Peoria) Chiefs.

    "Josh something"

    I return to my car and begin to pull away from the pump, all the while realization sinks in that my sister had just sold her car to Chicago Cubs top prospect Josh Vitters, in town for the summer. We had our own Seinfeldian, John/Jon Voight moment.

    And then it happened. A loud thump followed by a metallic dragging prefaces me stopping the car to realize I've pulled the gas hose from the pump and driven away. I went inside to explain what happened and gave my information to the clerk.

    Of course, I'd like to blame Josh Vitters. Can't do it. Unless of course it's Josh Viters, the periodontist.
  2. ArnoldBabar

    ArnoldBabar Active Member

    You should go to a Chiefs game and get him to bite a pencil. Or your arm. Or both.
  3. pallister

    pallister Guest

    Damnit, Arnold stole my pencil post. Jerk!

    As scatter-brained as I can be, it's the upset of the century I haven't driven off with the gas pump still in my car, especially since I put gas in my car more than most people.
  4. ArnoldBabar

    ArnoldBabar Active Member

    Well, I would hope most people aren't just randomly putting gas in your car. That would be weird.
  5. pallister

    pallister Guest

    It's late, cut me some slack on my bad sentence structure.
  6. ArnoldBabar

    ArnoldBabar Active Member

    Now that I think about it, though, it would be awesome if people put gas in your car.
  7. pallister

    pallister Guest

    I've read about that kind of thing happening in the old days. Could be an urban legend, though.
  8. Del_B_Vista

    Del_B_Vista Active Member

    The jerk store called. They ran out of you.
  9. BYH

    BYH Active Member

    Pallister has a similiar story, except it's called "A White Sox prospect and me buying him a can of Pabst."
  10. pallister

    pallister Guest

    I wish.
  11. ArnoldBabar

    ArnoldBabar Active Member

    And I will now step aside and not post the follow-up so that pallister can. I would never steal his post twice in one night.
  12. pallister

    pallister Guest

    Now that you're ordering me around, I don't want to.
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