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A conversation I wish didn't happen UPDATE: She's gone.

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by forever_town, Jun 26, 2009.

  1. forever_town

    forever_town Active Member

    As some of you know, my mother and I have a non-relationship. I haven't spoken to her in about five years, if not longer.

    Until tonight.

    She called me tonight and told me that my grandmother's liver shut down. She's been admitted to hospice. She has days left. My other grandmother has Alzheimer's and lives in a retirement community about five minutes away.

    If it isn't one thing, it's another.
     
  2. 93Devil

    93Devil Well-Known Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    Prayers are with you.

    Mend fences while you can, if you can.
     
  3. BYH

    BYH Active Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    Oof, that sucks.

    Sorry to hear it, F_Town, and I echo 93D (for once!). Repair your relationship with your Mom, if at all possible.
     
  4. trifectarich

    trifectarich Well-Known Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    Life is too short to hold grudges. Realizing that it takes two to tango, mend the fence if you can.

    Good luck.
     
  5. buckweaver

    buckweaver Active Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    Being in a somewhat similar parental situation, I'm not sure if I'll echo the above advice except to say don't have any regrets about how you go forward with your mother -- be at peace with it, and her if possible, no matter what you choose.

    And I do hope your grandmother is at peace and out of much pain, as well. Don't hesitate to drop everything and try to see her now, because you might not get another chance.

    Sending you and your family good vibes from way out here, F_T ...
     
  6. Just_An_SID

    Just_An_SID Active Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    I don't know the source of your problems with your mother, but this might be a good time to improve them. With her mother sick, she could use some support and may have a change of heart over whatever caused the problems.

    Reach out to her. It may pay off in spades.
     
  7. forever_town

    forever_town Active Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    Thank you, everyone.
     
  8. I Should Coco

    I Should Coco Well-Known Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    That's rough news, F-T. I hope for the best for you and your grandmothers.
     
  9. shockey

    shockey Active Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    let me offer my own unsolicited advice: if at all possible, do whatever you can to mend fences with your mom. there is no downside to it, f-t. she could obviously use you now and thought enough to break the ice by alerting you to your grandmother's condition. let something good come of this.

    i can't imagine you regretting it. if the attempt at reconciliation is rejected, well, then it's on her, not you.
     
  10. Matt1735

    Matt1735 Well-Known Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    F_T,

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, in particular your Grandmother. I hope she is not in pain and that you are able to be with her in her final hours.
     
  11. sportsguydave

    sportsguydave Active Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    My thoughts are with you, F_T.

    I have no idea what the genesis of the rift with your mom is .. but I wanted to share my favorite line from one of my favorite movies: "Only those who forgive earn the right to be forgiven."

    All you can do is try to reach out. If it's not meant to be ... then you did your best.
     
  12. waterytart

    waterytart Active Member

    Re: A conversation I wish didn't happen

    Not meaning to ignore the other posters' advice about your mother, but the acute situation is with your grandmother. If there is anything you want or need to say to her, your focus needs to be there.

    Prayers for strength.
     
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