50 Shades of Grey: Not the story of Big Ben's penis

Did you have to Google "gorilla mask" or were you already aware?

 

Right. Apparently there is quite a bit of BDSM. I would like to hear more about that.

 

TV, are you usually the masker or the maskee?

 

This started as Twilight fan fiction? Christ, this means the book featuring Harry, Ron and Hermoine's three-way must be available soon.

50 Shades of Grey, as read by Ellen DeGeneres:

 

Sad to know you didn't read it. When I read this review, I imagined you wrote it.

http://www.foreveryoungadult.com/2012/04/06/my-safe-word-is-dnf/

 

This is the first time I have ever seen the word "faff" in my life. I bet even Versatile didn't know that one.

 

Did you tell her she was smart or pretty?

 

Um, he said he hadn't seen such a woman.

 

Reading is hard.

 

What is this Redding lard you speak of?

 

Me too. I knew what gorilla mask was, but not faff. What does that say of me?

 

This doesn't surprise me.

Every lover I had possessed at least one battery powered "helper". One woman had four different ones. Each with a unique purpose or place.

As for the bondage part, that is probably still somewhat a niche. Although I think each female desires the trust to have her partner explore and surprise her. The ones I knew never wanted to be demeaned, of course, but they all wanted a man taking charge and guiding them on what to do.

Want a similar tale? Go read "The North China Lover".