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2006-07 SJ.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by Angola!, Mar 8, 2007.

  1. Angola!

    Angola! Guest

    Re: SportsJournalists.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

    BYH 87, sportschick 77
    sportschick (22-11)
    tats 9 8-9 26; piercings 1 0-5 2; youngboys 15 11-12 41; goatees 1 2-2 4; youngwomen 0 0-1 0; aggies 0 0-4 0; broncos 2 0-0 4. Totals 28 21-33 77.
    BYH (33-1)
    Oz 0 0-0 0; Alex Gordon 22 2-2 46; Gil Meche 0 0-14 0; VCU 9 4-7 31; bitteryoungfiance 2 2-2 6; 05steelers 2 0-0 4. Totals 35 8-25 87.
    Halftime score -- BYH 52, sportschick 33. 3-point goals -- BYH 9 (VCU 9). Total fouls -- sportschick 19, BYH 25. Fouled out -- BYH, Gil Meche. Technical fouls -- BYH, Gil Meche. Ejected -- BYH, Gil Meche. Rebounds -- sportschick 39 (youngwomen 32), BYH 12 (Alex Gordon 5). Assists -- sportschick 22 (youngboys 11), BYH 19 (05steelers 4). Steals -- sportschick 12 (youngboys 7), BYH 29 (05steelers 29). Blocks -- sportschick 6 (youngwomen 6), BYH 0. Turnovers -- sportschick 29, BYH 11.
     
  2. sportschick

    sportschick Active Member

    Re: SportsJournalists.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

    That youngwomen is a hella great defensive player. If I can ever get her to shoot the damned ball, we'd score a lot more.
     
  3. BYH

    BYH Active Member

    Re: SportsJournalists.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

    33-1? To whom did I lose?

    ASAP SPORTS TRANSCRIPT

    CRAPPY PR GUY: "Yeah listen folks I'm I'm I'm sorry but BYH isn't going to be taking questions today. He's celebrating with his family and we we we we apologize for him not not not being..."

    BYH: "What the fuck are you doing?"

    CRAPPY PR GUY: (indecipherable stuttering)

    BYH: "You've only got two people that are going to tell you I'm not going to be here. One is our SID and the other is me. Who the hell told you I wasn't going to be here? I'd like to know."

    CRAPPY PR GUY: (indecipherable stuttering)

    BYH: "Do you have any idea who it was? Who? They were from BYH U, right? No, they weren't from BYH U and you didn't get it from anybody from BYH U, did you?"

    CRAPPY PR GUY: (indecipherable stuttering coupled with some whimpering)

    BYH: "No, I'll handle this the way I want to handle it now that I'm here. You fucked it up to begin with! Now just sit there or leave, I don't care what you do!"

    CRAPPY PR GUY: (puddle of urine)

    BYH: "Now back to the game."

    REPORTER: "BYH how does this feel?"

    BYH: "Believe it or not, I'm walking on air. Never felt so free. Oh what a feeling. I'm dancing on the ceiling. No one's ever gone through a road like this to win the SportsJournalists.com national title."

    REPORTER: "No one's ever won the SportsJournalists.com national title before."

    BYH: "Whatever. Frank Ridgeway, poster of the year Bubbler, wicked, Slappy, Cinderella ThreeBagsFull and Sportschick...I'm the most battle-tested champion ever. Demonstrably. We just took it one game at a time and took it day by day and I'd like to thank Allah for our success, because I know it'll piss off Hondo."

    REPORTER: "How much of an effect did the eight-second clock have on your win over Sportschick?"

    BYH: "Oh it was provably and demonstrably immeasurable. She's used to real men."

    REPORTER: "BYH, you were highly critical of the selection committee when seedings were announced..."

    BYH: "We shocked the world motherfuckers! Shocked the world!"

    CRAPPY PR GUY: "Bee Bee BYH you can't say motherfucker on TV."

    BYH: "Why the fuck are you still here? Go back to not doing anything."

    REPORTER: "But you were the no. 1 seed, BYH, and the no. 2 seed in the entire tournament."

    BYH: "No one thought we could do this. We got screwed by the selection committee. I think Angola went to George Mason. Where's Angola? Angola? Fuck you buddy! Suck my big giant cock!"

    Reporter: "BYH we all know you have a small weenie."

    CRAPPY PR GUY: "Please please folks BYH's penis is off-limits."

    BYH: "Not tonight it's not!"

    Reporter: "BYH what do you think of those who called you a fraud?"

    BYH: "Just a buncha pot-bellied message board morons who ran track in high school instead of playing a real sport. They know nothing."

    REPORTER: "But aren't you..."

    BYH: "This press conference is over! OVER!"

    End of FastScripts
     
  4. BYH

    BYH Active Member

    Re: SportsJournalists.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

    Wow. This is impressive.

    Love the ease with which Oz transferred to my school! :D
     
  5. Oz

    Oz Well-Known Member

    Re: SportsJournalists.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

    Well, yeah. Too bad I'm a defense-only player, apparently. For the money and the SUV you provided me, I ought to be a 20-10 guy.
     
  6. BYH

    BYH Active Member

    Re: SportsJournalists.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

    HA! Outstanding work.
     
  7. Mystery_Meat

    Mystery_Meat Guest

    Re: SportsJournalists.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

    [/quote]

    The true highlight of the sports year for my almost alma mater.

    This is like a video game -- you don't need any depth to be successful.
     
  8. imjustagirl2

    imjustagirl2 New Member

    Re: SportsJournalists.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

    Actually, and I'm pretty sure it's AP style, maybe it's just my paper, but exact time is done in numbers.

    8 seconds would be right.
     
  9. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    Re: SportsJournalists.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

    TAHOE – In one fell swoop, BYH battered babes and boobs – the latter in the form of hack PR flack with such a stammer that he made Elton John singing Bennie and The Jets seem like Henry Higgins.
    “To the victor, go the spoils?” you ask.
    You’d like to think so, you really would. But for BYH, the 87-77 winner of the SportsJournalists.com March Madness title on Sunday night, work on next season began eight seconds ago.
    As he looked around the arena, wearing his Green and White warm-up suit before the semifinals, he asked himself one pertinent question:
    “I’m the coach. What the hell am I wearing a warm-up suit for if I don’t have to warm up?”
    So he work and warmed up.
    He found a way to keep sportschick’s baby chicks in check. Sure, youngboys and tats were going to score with sportschick; they always do. The key was to make sure the others didn’t hit it.
    Piercings, who usually scored through any defense, was held to two points. Youngwomen, who switches freely from offense and defense, simply had no clue.
    Credit BYH for one thing if you will, the brilliance of bringing little-used Bean in off the bench on defense so baffled sportschick that she called a timeout with 12:01 to go – yes, one second before the TV timeout – and stared at the underwear-clad Brit for all but eight ticks of the expanded break.
    It was the playground bully pulling down your pants and taunting you, only with more estrogen.
    And the result was that BYH held made sure that sportschick, who can usually score when she wants with who she wants, couldn't. Is giving up 77 points a defensive effort? It doesn't take an f-tard to figure that out.
    But as much as the chickies were bullyied on the court, the true bullying was reserved for the post-game. Ever gracious in victory, BYH reached out a hand; not for peace, but petty sniping.
    PR flacks, chicks, previous foes and foibles – all bewitched, bewildered and battered. He even challenged his own PR type, Jay Horwitz, when he couldn’t remember who he lost to in a gaudy 33-1 record that most posters (and other posers) would kill for.
    Horwitz croaked an answer that BYH had to live with and history will record: An early season blowout by Poloponies, when BYH was taking a posting break for his (and our) mental health.
    He ripped the selection committee for his opponents; he ragged on those who called him a fraud.
    So for the next season, BYH wears the mantle of champion. And rightfully so, with the teams he faced in the tourney. He earned every bit the fight and right to be champion.
    The jury is out on whether that champion will become a winner.

    Slappy is a columnist for sportsjournalists.com. He can be reached at fuckemdawg@booyah.com.
     
  10. Big Buckin' agate_monkey

    Big Buckin' agate_monkey Active Member

    Re: SportsJournalists.com March Madness GAME TIME on Page 25

    You weren't around to see the end?
     
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