The world according to Ray Ratto

Here's the Patriots, according to Ray Ratto:

https://deadspin.com/hate-the-patriots-for-the-right-reason-1832130758

 

The tagline...ha ha.

 

I shared a column section with him a decade ago for about two years. Always enjoyed him. He hasn't lost his fastball, and I'm glad to see he's been given space by Deadspin. It's astounding he can't find regular space with a mainstream sports outlet. Maybe this is for the best, let him spread his wings a bit, drop the occasional f-bomb.

 

I would not mind Ray Ratto Cultural Critic. Seriously - the Chronicle should give him Herb Caen's old space.

 

Not to mention that when Tolbert started on his seasonal "Who's better? Manning or Brady? Michael or Kobe?" talk, Ratto was there douse him with water and remind him - and the audience - that yes, the NFL and NBA DID really exist before the ESPN age and the athletes really were good then, even though modern-day media doesn't so much as acknowledge them now.

One of my favorites - and there are many - was when Ratto was a guest on Tolbert's show one day several years ago (Ralph Barbieri must have still been Tolbert's co-host), and Tolbert asked one of his lengthy, 10-part questions, to which Ratto eventually replied, "Well, to answer your question from five minutes ago …"

 

There’s a lot of wisdom here. For while, but especially the last couple years, it’s not been just about how good you are as a sports writer. Sadly, it’s sometimes comes down to how much money you’re willing to work for. Ratto is very good and has probably made at least a couple hundred thousand a year for the last decade. Few places want to pay that now.

 

Barbieri was even worse. I heard him once spend three minutes introducing Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Seriously, if you didn't know who he is - you wouldn't be listening to a sports talk show. One of the major irritants of sports talk is people who talk a lot, but don't say anything, find ways to humble brag about their great life and important friends, and weave the previous night's sports outcome in with the zeitgeist of the day. "And that's why the NFL Draft is like The Bachelor!"

 

On top of all that, Ralph was one of the biggest fanbois ... at least as big as it gets in the Bay Area.

 

Am I the only one enjoying seeing Ratto in just a week and a couple posts show up the rest of the Deadspin staff? You put his stuff next to theirs and they look like amateur hour.

I know part of this is because he's posting stuff in his wheelhouse, but good god he's so much better than them (and most everybody else.)

https://deadspin.com/nobody-wants-the-raiders-1832398283

 

“You say you hate Tom Brady when in fact he’s shown more personality, both slickly and prickly, than any other Patriot-related figure since Will McDonough.”

This whole column was outstanding. I’m a Warriors fan and have loved Ray for years and years.

 

https://deadspin.com/nobody-wants-the-raiders-1832398283

Here's Ray's latest on the Ray-duhs

In sum, Davis has a thing of allegedly great value that nobody else wants to have anywhere near them. It’s as though he had just cornered the market on plague and is baffled that the market for death in the streets just isn’t there.

It’s probably not fair to completely gut the little fellow here, but this being Deadspin, fair ain’t got nothin’ to do with it.
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Bam! Knew it wouldn't take long till Ray started shitting where he eats.