Dear dimwit on the phone

The longest meet I've done was last year at 11 hours. Thirty-two schools (Varsity and JV) at an invitational. But at $21/hr. plus food, kind of worth it.

 

As an intern, I once spent six or seven hours covering a youth meet that featured US and Canada swimmers. We had a ton of local swimmers in it and the SE told me to write up a story about how the locals did and how the meet went, since it was being held in our town. What he failed to tell me was some of the local swimmers were swimming unattached to a swim club, so it wasn't obvious they were from the home town. So I spend the better part of a Saturday watching people go from one end of the pool to the other and pretend like it is some how interesting. I get the information, results of the local kids, some quotes and write up a story. I returned to work later that week and got chewed out for missing some local kids. I told him I got everyone who was local and it wasn't my fault that I had no way to know that there were some kids from the area swimming. So he's still pissed when he gets a phone call and then throws me under the bus to some angry parent.

From that point on, I refuse to spend any more time at a swim meet than I absolutely have to. I stay long enough to get a few photos of several different kids and maybe get a feel for how which team seems to be doing well, then I call the coach later. Mind you I'm not covering the Olympic trials or even California high school section finals here, but I feel unless there is something huge like that on the line, there really is no reason to stay the whole meet. Of course, I'm just jaded.

 

That's insane. No sporting event, short of say, an Ironman Triathlon, should last that long.

When I was younger I tried to attend the whole event. Had supervisors criticize me for racking up too many hours and would say "just go catch the finish and get a couple of quotes". I responded by saying that wasn't the best way to cover an event, that we don't just go to the fourth quarter of a football game. But, still, 11 hours is asking a bit much. (I couldn't fathom typing that much agate under any circumstances.)

Then again so is $21 per hour. Hope the food was good.

 

Our high school swim (and track) meets have finals all day, so you can't just show up at the end and get team scores. Well, I suppose you could... but you'd miss all the individual dramas which would make the story more than just a rehash of agate.

In the 100 meters, the runners all line up across the track together and lean at the finish. If that looks like your 5,000 meters, you must have a lot of very good distance runners who don't care about adding the (slight) extra distance from running in an outside lane.

Same thing for swimming. The freestyle looks completely different from the other three strokes. Butterfly, the arms are outstretched -- and if the photog's really good, you see a fabulous reflection in the pool. Breaststroke, your hands are close together when they enter the water.

Or maybe I've just been lucky enough to work with some really great photogs over the years.

 

Yeah, Paper Doll, I got that. But I shouldn't expect every person who picks up the paper to be an expert on swimming strokes. To the average eye looking at a still shot (where you can't see the movement), they look very similar. I suppose if you ran a side-by-side of a breaststroke and a butterfly, an expert like you could show the difference. But not the average reader.

Besides, I wouldn't expect most photographers to know that, not if they only shoot swimming a handful of times per year. We're still trying to get the photog to use "runs" instead of "points" in baseball/softball cutlines.

 

Dear score/timekeeper at last night's hockey game,

I'm overjoyed that you brought your laptop and have been blasting top-40 hits all game, but couldn't you fucking do your job?!? When the ref comes over to give you scores how about you actually write down what he said. Number 29 for Podunk didn't score because there's no 29 on the roster. Nothing like scrambling after a game to figure out who scored a key goal because you were too inept to do the simplest of jobs.

I'm happy you thought to play Amish Paradise after a goal, but how about stopping the clock after said goal.

Regards,
BN4324

 

If it's a key goal...and you were there...why don't YOU know who scored?

 

"Your TV listings say the Australian Open is on ESPN2 at 8 and I just turned it on and they're showing basketball."

Well, ma'am, sometimes if the game is long... wait, what time did you say the tennis started?

"It says 8 p.m."

Ma'am, it's 7:50.

 

Recording who scored a goal isn't as easy as you might think, especially on those scrambles in front of the net where there are a lot of bodies real close together. Depending on where you are seated, it's not always easy to keep sight of the puck and who touched it last. (And, of course, you don't have the benefit of instant replay, either.)

For that reason, I always kept my own score sheet and then double-checked against the official scoresheet between periods and after the game. One thing that annoyed me were what seemed like grossly inflated shot and save totals.

 

Sometimes the Dimwit doesn't even have to call in, sometimes the dimwit works in your own office:

I come into work after noon each day. Usually its about 12:30, sometimes 1 p.m. depending on what is going on. This happens everyday. Everyday I don't show up until after noon. So what possesses the front counter lady to tell people I will be in at 11:30 a.m? I never come in that early and all I get is irked people. So I tell her to stop telling people I come in at 11:30 and I get this dumbfounded look. How is this so hard? If I'm not there when you keep telling people I will be there, if people come in/call back irritated that I'm not there when you made up I will be, why does it take me telling you to stop doing it for you to finally understand? Shouldn't you have thought that maybe this is a regular pattern and at the very least asked me what to tell people if they call in the morning?

 

It's probably her passive-aggressive way of letting you know she thinks you're lazy and should be at work before noon. In her mind, you're just someone who gets to "sleep in late" and draw a paycheck from the toy department of the newspaper.