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Best man etiquette

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by JayFarrar, Jun 9, 2009.

  1. Matt Foley

    Matt Foley Member

    Within the next year or so I will be attending the wedding of one of my college buddies and I know for a fact that at least three of the people attending will have had sex with the bride as well (one of whom will definitely be in the running to be the best man), all I can say is that I hope for his sake the groom lays down some serious rules as far as toasts and speeches go.
     
  2. Double J

    Double J Active Member

    "But honestly, do I really deserve the title of 'best man'? Hey, only the bride knows for sure, haha!"
     
  3. budcrew08

    budcrew08 Active Member

    Rectum? Damn near killed 'em!

    Har, har, har.

    :)
     
  4. Appgrad05

    Appgrad05 Active Member

    Stories JayFarrar can never tell the Virgin for $300, Alex.
     
  5. outofplace

    outofplace Well-Known Member

    It isn't about ground rules for the best man. It is about choosing a best man worthy of the job. I had a funny line story that I desperately wanted to use in my speech. The bride and groom would have laughed. The groom's family and all of their friends would have laughed. But I think the bride's family might have been offended, so I left it out. Sure, you can have some fun at the expense of the groom in the speech, maybe even tweak the bride a little. But the bottom line is to make sure EVERYBODY is smiling when you are done.
     
  6. lono

    lono Active Member

    That also applies at the bachelor party, especially if ANY of the bride's family are in attendance.

    Then again, maybe I'm the wrong guy to ask.

    I was kidnapped and taken out of the country for my bachelor party, my best man is in jail and we were married by a notary public.
     
  7. outofplace

    outofplace Well-Known Member

    That sounds like a fun story.

    I remember a good bit of grumbling about the rules for my best friend's bachelor party. I even teased him about agreeing to not go to a strip club. But we spent the day doing exactly what he wanted to do and we all had a great time, especially the groom. I'll have to wait until he is married a while. Then we'll take him to a club. :)
     
  8. bruins2585

    bruins2585 New Member

    Keep the toast short and simple. If you go for the home run and strike out, you will never hear the end of it from all parties involved.
     
  9. three_bags_full

    three_bags_full Well-Known Member

    I'm thinking it's some sort of pressure-release valve ... like some sort of hydraulic system. Pressure gets too high and endangers the system, and the valve pops.
     
  10. JayFarrar

    JayFarrar Well-Known Member

    See you made an assumption here and assumptions are like assholes, eveyone has them -- except when they don't have assholes.
    Actually ... the (not a) virgin (anymore), the bride to be and the girl with no asshole were all freshwomen together at the same liberal arts school. Then the bride to be and the girl with no asshole transfered together to another school.
    The (not a) virgin (anymore) is already aware of the girl with no asshole and has knowledge (not firsthand) of the lack of an asshole on the girl with no asshole.
     
  11. outofplace

    outofplace Well-Known Member

    But does she know you have seen the lack of an asshole? :)
     
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