Sports reporter to undergo sex change

confession is good for the soul.

i'm sure you feel much better now, zagohe/she

 

WayneW -- Thanks for the lesson. I'll keep that in mind next time my editor tells me to make that one more phone call to get a little, yet substantial, fact to fill out my stories. If you think the fact that the person in question's impending divorce is not a part of the story, then I don't know what to tell you. Nobody is asking for a play by play of the divorce preceedings, but it is a helpful and telling fact.

 

Yes I do feel better.

Now pardon me while I go chew tobacco, wave my confederate flag, clean my gun and put it back on the rack in my pick-up so I can go picket the next homosexual pride day and call a radio station to make fun of C. Vivian Stringer.......

 

What, you mean there are no Dixie Chicks CD-trashing festivals this weekend?

 

The column had a narrow focus. Gender identity -- more specifically switching gender -- as a sportswriter. Should it also have included comment from medical professionals? Details about sex life? Comments from the athletes likely to be interviewed by Christine in the future? She could have written a series of no comments on those issues -- but didn't need to. The parameters of the story and what was left out took care of that.

Now if the paramters of the blog are set up as -- here is what it's like to transition from male to female, then I certainly think it'd be fair to cite holes if the family/marriage questions were not answered.

 

If the neanderthal behavior fits....

 

Tell me about it...

Crossdressers and late transitioning people are usually very good at hiding it. After getting smacked around (figuratively and/or literally) for non-conforming gender behavior, you quickly learn that it's not a good idea to show it. As comedian Eddie Izzard said, something about the possibility of being beaten to death with sticks is a bit of an incentive. (Early transitioning TS, ones who transition as soon as they can after they turn 18, are an exception. (Someone like Gwen Araujo http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gwen_Araujo.) Typically they display cross-gendered behavior from an early age, even in the face of substantial family pressure against it.)

It also should be noted that often trans people are in denial themselves. There's a great deal of shame and guilt involved for many folks (I'm just thankful that's never been the case for me.) That's one thing that convinces me crossdressing is more than "a lifestyle choice." There's a number of CDs who would dearly love to stop (and often do what's referred to as "purging" where they throw out their women's clothing and vow to never do it again) but from what I've seen that's rarely successful.

Some SOs are also a bit willfully blind to "leakage." There seem to be tendency for some MTF trans people to marry women with more rigid ideas about gender roles -- probably as a subconscious attempt to put the brakes on their trans-ness. (Unfortunately, that rarely works.) So it's probably bit more likely in these cases. (The experience for FTMs is typically a bit different, since many self-identify as lesbians, often butch lesbians, initially. That's probably because butches provide a visible niche that FTMs attracted to women can try to fit into (i.e. it may not what they fully want, but allows them a life that's closer to what they desire), whereas FTMs who are attracted to men don't have an equivalent. FWIW, from what I've seen, because of the wider latitude in clothing and gender roles allowed women, it can be harder for FTMs to recognize that their sense of "feeling not quite right" is related to gender dissonance -- the "problem without a name" issue -- in contrast to MTFs, where it's hard to ignore that you're crossing gender boundaries.)

 

It gnaws at a lot of people. So no worries -- its a difficult subject which causes many people to have problems in dealing with it.

Not the least of which is all the TG folks themselves.

I wasn't abusive, however. Rage prone, yes -- and, in situations where my actions wouldn't affect my family directly while I was with them and in my youthful days (I married late) I was extremely violent.


Its not noticed because its little things, and the overall picture is one of almost cartoonish masculinity in some cases. Plus, this is internal -- testosterone does its little trick to us when we're young and aids in the fooling aspect.

Then there's the fact that when you are young, you learn *fast* how to copy others, just to get by. To avoid being picked on or harassed. Since you are taught early to hide it, you do -- so well that often you hide it from yourself during the day.

I talked about wishing. That was at night. In bed. During the day, I never let it cross my path, and I sought to avoid anything that would get my in proximity to something that might be considered feminine.

So there was nothing overtly notable about this.

When I told my best friend -- who has known me for over 15 years -- he was rather surprised. My wife wasn't when I actually broke through -- but she was surprised years before when I broke down and described to her the wishing issue.

She was very surprised. And hurt (there's more to it as well, all of it somewhat classical), but we stuck together and kept going.

If its any consolaton it doesn't register in my brain, either. This is why I said I regretted that I married her. Becuase it put me in a position of having decieved her -- but I only recognized that after the fact.

At the time, if you had said something, I'd not only have denied it, I'd have taken you to task for suggesting it.

So it happens. In some conversations where I'm in a position to debate, I'll note that, in a very real sense (though not a technical scientific one) I was compelled by societal restrictions to find a woman and marry her to have a child -- and I very much wanted a child -- which means that society forced me into a lesbian relationship, from my POV.

 

One of my old housemates is now a post-op MTF.

We always knew he was a tad bit different. Never really cared. We just assumed he was in the closet. Then he got a gig in NYC and began the transition. When he made the move, he cut off all contact with most of us. He remained friends with just one person. Sadly, I guess he didn't think I would understand or accept him becoming a her. It's too bad, because as long as she's happy then I'm glad for her.

I'd like to thank the trans posters for giving some insight into what they went through and are still going through.

 

You sound dumb when you say stuff like that.

 

I think the Times is just thrilled to have another female on staff...