Ric Bucher and his personal deity, Kobe Bryant - Egregious Examples #1 & #2

[RokSki]

Here's the link.  It's the lede on the front page of ESPN.com

http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/dailydime?page=dailydime-061201

Bucher, quite simply, gets giddy like a schoolgirl whenever Bryant's name is mentioned.  Bucher also appropriately despises Shaq.  If you didn't know better, you'd think Bucher had been one of 'Kobe's guys' in the Lakers' past locker rooms, and was thus shunned by Shaq because the Big Guy knew anything he said could and would be used against him by Bucher to prop up Kobe and denigrate Shaq.

Bucher also recently did a book with Yao Ming, and has been angling for years to be the 'lucky' writer (that is, the winner of the 'most in-the-tank for') whom Kobe selects to be his co-author for the inevitable future Bryant book. 

Bucher started his latest "Bryant's Biggest Sycophant" tour last night on ESPN Radio's 'Gamenight.'  He just happened, coincidentally of course, to appear on the show when Kobe was having a big game.  Today's ESPN piece is no surprise to anyone who's been watching this drama play out the last few years.

Ok, Bucher wants a book deal with Bryant.  Yes, he's still mad Shaq and the Heat made him look like a fool after his picking the Mavs in 5 in The Finals (pathetic post-justifications he attempted aside).  We can all understand these elements.

But his latest Daily Dime reaches new heights of defensiveness, Kobe-worship and self-caricature.  And that's quite an accomplishment for a long-time Bryant supplicant such as Bucher.

First, we're fed the absolute farce that Bucher didn't really want to write about Bryant.  An absurd comment on its face, as anyone with a memory can attest.  But this mendacity sets the tone for the rest of the breathless column.

Soon thereafter begins Bucher's trained seal act.  You mention Kobe, Bucher claps his flippers together harder than he does for anyone else's name.  To paraphrase some of the claps: 


Kobe is the best player in the league.  Kobe is the second best offensive director in the NBA behind only two-time MVP Steve Nash.  Why does everyone dislike Kobe, anyway?  I mean, it's not like he got himself involved in something stupid like an alleged rape, right?  Do not make me use my "iodine-in-the-well" metaphor, either, because I do have that in my arsenal.  Yep, learned that at Dartmouth.  Why, O why Lord, must I -- Ric Bucher -- be The One to defend Kobe Bryant repeatedly.  Has no one else eyes?  I'm tired of defending him, really, I am.  And all this talk of Lebron and D-Wade is going to hurt my Kobe book's market, and I'm not having any of that.  Now I'm going to pull my trump card, and explain away his quitting on his team in game 7 against the Suns in the 2006 playoffs.  That's right, he was hurt.  Got it?  I don't care if he displayed no signs of injury in the rest of the series.  He had to get surgery this (2006) summer (after the series ended), duh?  So, I say he was hurt in Game 7.  That's it.  I will not have my future co-author slimed (and de-valued) with the worst taint possible for a pro athlete: a 'quit-on-his-team' guy, a Plaxico Burress.  What, you say he did this before?  Sacramento?  Bah, I say.  He must have been hurt then, too.  Let me finish up here with an outdated-by-40-years "I Love Lucy" quip to end my tripe.  There!  Refute that!


Bucher used to be my favorite NBA writer.  He knows the game well, and has always gotten excellent access to all the pertinent subjects I cared about in the league.  But he's descended, Ahab-like, into a seemingly intensely personal quest to vindicate all things Kobe and get that book deal.

I can't take him seriously any more, because he has too many agendas to fulfill and scores to settle to be able to write objectively.  He's become for Kobe what Ahmad Rashad was for Jordan, nothing more. 

If Bucher were the captain of a ship, he would now be relieved of command, voluntarily or otherwise:  The crew of readers can no longer trust where their captain is taking them with his pen.  Detractors, real or imagined, are everywhere, and the captain will see his Kobe vessel to port no matter what, crew be damned. 

Thanks, Cap'n Bucher.  It was a great ride when you still cared about your crew of readers.  Oh, and good luck with getting that book deal.  And with your ongoing battle to explain-away Shaq's 4th ring and your brutal pick of the Mavs over the Heat.

[DrRosenpenis]

Wow.

[Cousin Jeffrey]

It's Diety.

[Zeke12]

While that is a horseshit column, I find your level of vehemence a tad disturbing.

[RokSki]

It's Diety.

We both misspelled it, but thanks for the catch.  So much for "i before e except after c," huh? 

Thanks again.

[RokSki]

While that is a horseshit column, I find your level of vehemence a tad disturbing.

If you think this is a high level of vehemence from this corner, you obviously don't know me.  But I get your point. 

I detest the current Bucher (like I said, he used to be my favorite) and his transparent motives and vendettas.  He has not been properly called on his Kobe-fever over the past several years.  I just said what needed to be said. 

If you think I sound a tad disturbing, what say you about that column and it's tone?  It's a joke - a bad joke - and it's tilting at windmills to boot.  Tilting in an unrepentant, angry, and triumphalist way.  It's intended to aggressively shout down dissenters to Bucher's opinion.  No apologies for my tone:  I'm not trying to win anyone's favor, Ric is.  Bucher's tripe got the response it deserved.

[fmrsped]

          I think that post by RokSki was post - of - the - year material.

[hypocritealert]

I think that post by RokSki was jealous piece of shit post of the year.

[Ralph Waldo Henderson]

RokSki obviously has some, er, issues. But calling Ric Bucher on the carpet for being a Kobe apologist is a good thing, no matter who does it.

[Fenian_Bastard]

The air suddenly smells strangely of cordite and blood.

[Xanadu]

He went to Dartmouth?

[RokSki]

I think that post by RokSki was jealous piece of shit post of the year.

Ah, the 'jealousy' gambit, refuge of all those who can't attack an argument based on its substance.  Thanks for chiming in, Ric.

There are things I know about Bucher which you almost certainly don't know, hyp.  I'll do Ralph Waldo H. proud here and show restraint.  Suffice to say, jealousy is not an emotion Bucher engenders in me. 

          I think that post by RokSki was post - of - the - year material.

  Thanks for the kind words, fmr.  I genuinely appreciate them.  But you should really thank the grovelling Bucher for this post.  Without his years-old pandering to Bryant, this post would never have existed.

RokSki obviously has some, er, issues. But calling Ric Bucher on the carpet for being a Kobe apologist is a good thing, no matter who does it.

RWH, I am just a bit too intense and strident for most, no question about it.  The defendant pleads guilty.  But, thanks.  I think.   

The air suddenly smells strangely of cordite and blood.

Excellent and apropos phrase, FB.  I'm sure RWH would agree that's often an apt description of the olfactory landscape when I rear my ugly head.

He went to Dartmouth?

Yeah, yeah.  *sadly shakes his head back and forth*  I'm not sure you'll find that fact highly publicized in the Big Green annals in light of his performance these past few years, particularly regarding Bryant.  As an alum of one of the colleges in Dartmouth's League, the legacy Bucher now bequeaths to said league is similar to the legacy one begets to a new car when he drives the freshly purchased car out of the dealership for the first time:  depreciation.  Thanks again, Ric.  He's effected the educational equivalent of what happens to your property value when drug dealers move in across the street.

[RokSki]

Here's another Bucher "Kobe's Johnnie Cochran" piece by Bucher.  I had forgotten about this one, but someone brought it back to my attention.

http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/dailydime?page=dailydime-060522

Bucher's is the second piece in the left-hand column.  To even attempt to suggest that Lebron's playoff game 7 against the Pistons was remotely similar to Kobe's game 7 against the Suns takes cajones that shouldn't fit in anyone's jeans.  Kobe quit, or whatever gentler verb you prefer.  Lebron went out on his shield, sword swinging.  The Pistons simply beat the Cavs into submission, whereas the Suns (with no Amare) offered zero defensive resistance.  There is no comparison between Kobe's and Lebron's game 7's, and Bucher knows it.  He just disingenuously chooses to ignore that fact.  But we'll get to that later.  First, let's take a look at some relevant statistics. 

Final scores.  Pistons-Cavs:  79-61.  Suns-Lakers:  121-90.  In the Cavs' game, shots were much more difficult to come by than in the the Lakers game, as someone as familiar with the NBA as Bucher would know given the Cavs' and Lakers' respective opponents. 

Team FGA.  Cavs:  65.  Lakers:  91!  That's right, there were 26 - yes, 26! - more shot attempts in the Lakers game available.  With that incredibly disparate number, you would figure Kobe would have taken a vastly higher number of shots than Lebron would have taken based on simple math.  Which leads to my next statistic.
Individual FGA.  Lebron:  24.  Kobe:  16.  Now, as Bucher, you could have taken all kinds of lines of argument to try to elevate Kobe and put down Lebron in your game 7 comparison.  You would've been wrong - as Bucher was - but you could have done so.  Fine.  But in a game where Kobe's team had 26 more FGA than Lebron's, Lebron ended up with 8 more FGA than Kobe.  To try to argue that Lebron should be taking the same heat as Kobe the Quitter, given these statistics, is beyond inane and asinine.  It's ludicrous.  And Bucher knows it is, too.   

FGA by half (total).  Kobe: 13/3 (16).  Lebron:  15/9 (24).  This deserves a follow-up statistic to fully appreciate the magnitude of this difference.  Team points in 2nd half:  Cavs - 23.  Lakers - 45.  The Cavs scored roughly half the points the Lakers did in their game 7 second half.  Even with twice as many points out there to take, Kobe had but 3 FGA's with his team's season on the line.  Three! Lebron took three times that amount of shots, and yet Bucher's trying to equate their performances?  Pathetic.  But it gets even worse.

         

[RokSki]

                               

(Pt. 2)

Team FGA by half (total).  Cavs - 39/26 (65).  Lakers - ((can't find stat); Extrapolation based on total FGA and balanced scoring {46 points and 45 points} in two halves):  "46/45 (91)" (yes, the FGA #s matches the corresponding points by half #s, that is not a mistake).  Using this comparison, Lebron took over 1/3rd (9/26) of all his team's FGA in the second half of his game 7.  Sound like a quitter?  A gunner, maybe, but certainly not a quitter.  Kobe doesn't come out looking so good:  (3/45).  3 of freaking 45!  Or 1/15th of his team's total FGA in the second half.  Remember, this is the NBA's scoring leader for '05-'06.  Looking at these stats, knowing these stats, Bucher is trying to tell you - the reader - that these two guys had about the same second halves of their game 7's.  He thinks you're a rube, a moron. 

There's one final "Bucher Defender's" counterargument to put-down here.  Well, someone will say, there's more to playing than scoring points.  True.  So let's look at the other statistics for the two players.  LJ: 8reb/2ast/1stl.  Kobe:  4reb/1ast/0stl.  Add to these damning stats the fact that the Pistons came out, specifically, in the second half determined to make Lebron pass the ball, running 2 or even 3 guys at him.  The Pistons admitted as such after the game.  Phoenix did nothing of the sort against Bryant.  Yet Kobe managed but 1/15ths of his team's FGA in the second half to Lebron 1/3rd.  Is there any basis of comparison here at all?  None.  Or as Bucher says in this version of the 'I Love Kobe Khronicles,' "nay."

There's only one reason Bucher printed this outrageously misleading piece:  Propaganda.  And damage control.  Bucher knew Kobe's image has taken a potentially fatal blow by his seemingly quitting on his team on national television in a game 7 in the playoffs.  If Bucher could rectify that image, and at the same time call Lebron's (i.e., Kobe's competition as 'the man' in the NBA) image into question, it would be perfect for Bucher's agenda.

That's what this piece attempts to do.  And for all the uneducated hoops fans, or for people just clicking through ESPN, this is what gets fed to them.  If ESPN wants to let this stuff out under their name, fine.  But someone has to announce the emperor has no clothes.  So, here goes:  Bryant quit in the second half of game 7 against the Suns, as he had done before in a game against the Sacramento Kings.  James played his ass off against the Pistons in his game 7 and was mugged by the Pistons for his troubles.  Bucher knew all of this, but he wrote this junk article to fulfill his Kobe agenda.

One final thing on the article referenced in this post and the one referenced in the first post on this thread:  If you compare the two, the 'reason' (read: excuse) for Kobe's quitting has changed.  Bucher has gotten the new Kobe Memo and the second half meltdown in game 7 is now, officially, because of the knee that had surgery on it this past summer.  No mention of that knee in the chronologically first article, is there?  I guess Kobe must have taken one heck of a fall between the first and second halves of game 7 for that knee to bug him into taking only 3 FGA in the second half.  Ric, thanks for the ex-post-facto injury update!

Don't believe all that you read.  Know the agenda behind the stories.  In this instance, it's just screaming out at the reader.  Such is the case when Ric Bucher covers Kobe Bryant.                                     

[21]

If I were Ric, I would strongly consider a restraining order.

You are waaaaay too interested in this.

[RokSki]

If I were Ric, I would strongly consider a restraining order.

Unnecessary.  A "proximity order," now that might be required, to get me anywhere near him if we're at the same event.  I don't suffer shills gladly.  As much as I dislike, professionally, what he's become, I've got nothing personal against Ric.  That's not an issue.  Ric's gone from a very talented writer to a mere hack, and one with a large platform.  Exposing hacks is a service to readers.  That's my goal here. 

You are waaaaay too interested in this.

The game 7 research speaks for itself, and the conclusion I reached is sound, particularly when you combine cited article #1, cited article #2, and many other recent Bucher columns, chats, radio appearances, etc. which deal with Kobe. 

How disappointing it would be, 21, if you don't appreciate the value of good legwork.  Particularly investigation done in the service of readers who would otherwise be misled for the sake of a compromised writer's agenda.  Truth is never sought worthlessly.

Muckraking takes work.  It also bears fruit.  The article I cited in today's post was brought to my attention by someone sympathetic to my feelings on Bucher's recent work regarding Kobe, and I dissected it for its patent absurdness.  That's it.  No biggy.  That's part of what I do in my job.  I simply turned the lens on this Bucher piece and it was, unsurprisingly, found wanting.

I love the NBA.  I care what's written about it.  When Bucher writes about Kobe, his stuff doesn't pass the smell test, and hasn't for years.  If you find that unimportant, that's your right.  I, however, value standards of honesty and integrity in my writing.  Especially when it concerns one of my favorite sports.  Ric's Kobe bunk doesn't deserve a pass, and it isn't getting one from this precinct.