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Looking for some feedback on an esports article

Discussion in 'Writers' Workshop' started by Mike Hebert, Jul 24, 2019.

  1. Mike Hebert

    Mike Hebert New Member

    Hey all,

    First post here, really enjoying these forums. I've been reading a lot on here and appreciate this community.

    I wanted to see if I could get some feedback on this recent story I wrote on esports in Atlanta. My editor wanted me to essentially explain esports to our readers and use the event (an Overwatch league team Atlanta Reign's first time hosting in Atlanta) as a scene.

    This is my first time writing on esports and I'm aware its sort of a new thing, but just wanted to see if anyone had any thoughts.

    Esports is rapidly growing, and Atlanta has a lot to do with it

    Thanks!
     
  2. jlee

    jlee Well-Known Member

    Mike,

    This is great stuff. You reported a lot of things I did not know, and I ended the article feeling more informed. I know that seems basic, but SO MANY sports features by longtime pros fail to do that. So thanks.

    In terms of improvement:

    — Avoid generalizations whenever possible. You nearly lost my attention with the second paragraph about what “most sports fans” expect. You were at an event. Tell me more about what you heard and saw there. I’d rather read something a bit too flowery about a real observation than an analysis based on assumption.

    — All of your sources have a professional stake in the success of esports. This story really needed a fan’s voice. Introduce me to someone who supports esports in Atlanta that isn’t getting paid — but actually shelling out their cash in return for the experience. What are they seeing when they watch the live match? How much time do they spend following the sport every day?

    — When an event sells out, especially one that needs a feature to explain what it is, get a sense of the ticket prices.

    Thanks again for posting, and I hope this helps.

    j
     
    justgladtobehere likes this.
  3. Mike Hebert

    Mike Hebert New Member

    Thanks for the feedback. That’s really helpful
     
    jlee likes this.
  4. Danwriter

    Danwriter Member

    I agree. Good stuff. I cover epsorts technology and venues and I learned a few things. But given the sport's newness and especially given info like "Georgia’s state film tax credit applies to esports," I was surprised not to see a single dollar sign in the article. Is there a valuation or quantification of any kind that supports the assertion that ATL is the main hub of the east? What does a ticket to the game cost? What are the players paid? But yeah, well done.
     
    jlee likes this.
  5. Mike Hebert

    Mike Hebert New Member

    Thanks for the feedback. That was the tricky part of this article. Not many folks were willing to share specifics when it came to money. I tried looking around and only got information that related to technology in Atlanta. I will keep that in mind going forward with future reporting on this. I can certainly find how much the event costs and add that in.
     
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